Friday, August 20, 2010

Wrandom Wramblings And Curmudgeonly Cogitations...

Getting My Part-Time Bitchin' Career Out Of Moth Balls...


So I see where the President and "First Lady" are heading off on another vacation to Martha's Vineyard.

Ten days this time.

You know what?

I don't really care if Obamarama, the professional community organizer come Prezbo, is on vacation, because when he's on vacation he can't screw anything up (as long as he keeps his stupid yap closed and locks Biden in a closet in the White House for the duration), and since the US Congress is also on vacation that means that my wallet is safe for another few weeks before the idiocy and spending of other peoples' money resumes.

You know what else?

I'd be willing to let the president and the whole damn congress fly off somewhere on Air Force One and in a fleet of Gulfstreams to parts unknown and not come back until January 2nd, 2011.

I figure that would save the taxpayers two or three TRILLION DOLLARS in the process and I wouldn't have to watch the news and wipe the spittle off my chin and computer screen as a result of listening to that silly hippy bitch Nasty Pelosi talk about the "progressive" topic du jour.

On the local injuneering front, I'm in the process of firing a couple of vendors as a result of their ineptitude this week, basically costing me five days waiting on them to do nothing but delay my progress.

How can you talk on the telephone for an hour on Monday with a "Customer Support" person, fill out a "Material Return Authorization" form, and then find out on Thursday afternoon that they have done ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to follow up on their offer to replace the defective sensors I have in my shop?

It all defies logic, and I'm stuck dead in the water until I receive new sensors because the ones I have don't work for some reason.

I'm ready to just go buy a big bottle of Vodka, a couple of cans of Pineapple, Orange, and Cranberry juice, some Ice, and an Intravenous bottle with a large bore IV needle and go on vacation my self...

Without leaving the farm Turbo Pup Compound.

Is it just ME???

Thursday, August 19, 2010

1970's Saturday Night Live Clip

Blast From My Past To YOU...


Everyone over the age of about 45 probably remembers seeing this clip of Jane Curtain and Dan Aykroyd live when it first aired in about 1976...




(and while you're at it, when you have the time...check out Dan's new "Crystal Head" Vodka bottle design...)





My local package store has several in stock...I just haven't ponyed up $50 for a half liter of clear liquor yet.


Heh...

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Someone Crushed My Toilet Paper...

Middle Aged Consumer "Quality Control" Issues


OK...dangit...somebody has apparently been squeezing my Charmin Scott TP.

I've had it up to here (pointing to the top of my ever greying, ever balding head) with coming home from CVS or Eckerds or Big Lots with my monthly load of four big bails of toilet paper on sale for half price, only to find when I open the package and mount said toilet paper on the little "roller thingie" (conveniently located where I have to stand up to reach it behind my left shoulder...

when I pull on my toilet paper roll--mounted so the paper comes off OVER rather than UNDER--(because only Democrats and Georgia/LSU graduates mount toilet paper any other way...)

When I pull on my toilet paper in order to dispense it for use...

it wobbles and bangs and goes "ker-thunka-ka-thunka" or even locks up thereby only giving me a single sheet sufficient to wipe the spit from my mouth or a tear from my eye...

...because that little cardboard tube on the inside of the roll has been crushed nearly flat due to mishandling or outright vandalism.

Thus I have two solutions to this problem this afternoon ladies and gentlemen.

The first would be a steel or aluminum or possibly carbon fiber tube designed to slide inside the aforementioned crushed cardboard tube in the toilet paper roll, thereby yielding a smooth and satisfying delivery of this restroom necessity.

Heck, If I had my way I'd mount the whole thing on super lubricated ball bearings and one single tug would result in the entire roll spinning off of the roller into the floor if you weren't paying attention.

Then the second idea is this...




A roll of toilet paper designed to last at least a month which is so inherently strong that during shipment or storage on store shelves it could not possibly be damaged so as to perform in a manner in my home while not delivering any "ker-thunka-ka-thunka" type sounds.

I know many people out there are as excited as I am with these new developments, and I'll let you know as soon as possible when one or both products are available on Amazon.com.






Heh...

"Those Voices Don't Speak For The Rest Of Us..."

Where Are Men (And Women) Like President Reagan When We Need Them?





It's frightening how words spoken almost fifty years ago ring so true when listening to the "Enlightened" Progressive Democrats blitherings today.

I Want One...

Mercedes SLS Gull Wing






Unfortunately I'm a couple of dollars short of the $200,000 price tag...but still...

Monday, August 16, 2010

Hummingbirds

Nature's Little Wonders...


I have to admit that until we moved down to St. Simons Island in 2003 I didn't know much about Hummingbirds other than they were out there in exotic locations like the Bahamas and Jamaica...because I had actually seen them down there.

Then on a whim while wandering around the local Ace Hardware I bought our first "Hummingbird feeder" and within a few weeks my eyes were opened to an entire new world occupied by these little amazing flying bundles of feathers and energy.

Today we maintain two feeders--one on the front porch and one in the back yard outside the kitchen window--and we enjoy the hilarious antics of the Ruby Throated hummers and an occasional few other species from about April to October each year.

That said, take a look at this short video clip of a new film shown on PBS about Hummers:



There are infinite websites now on the Internet giving information on the different birds indigenous to North America, and I've actually caught and held in my bare hand an errant bird which got trapped in my Mom's garage a few years ago.

If you've never had a hummingbird feeder you are missing a real treat.

We constantly laugh at their antics as the rival clans of birds put on aerial shows featuring daily "dog-fights" over dominance of our feeders, and we probably use as much sugar feeding our little clan of birds as we use cooking for humans in our kitchen.

Simple things...you know?

Saturday, August 14, 2010

It's Saturday And I Should Be Working...

I'm An Expert At Procrastination...


Dang It...

It's already 10:30 AM and I'm still sitting here in my underwear my PJ's doing anything and everything but what it is I'm supposed to be doing this morning.

Normally we do our grocery shopping early on Saturday morning, but today I slept in late after being up until 4 AM thrashing around in the shop and smoking the last couple of inches of yesterday afternoon's cigar on the front porch listening to the crickets chirp.

I'm having a hard time getting motivated because this current project has been laying around on the test bench for so long and I'm just generally tired of looking at it but somehow I'm going to have to muster a Herculean effort to wrap things up and get it all out the door in a cloud of dust on Monday...TWO WEEKS LATE.

Better to be late had have a product that works than be on time with something that at best makes a nice giant desk paper weight...you know?

Of course as is usual I have a multitude of distractions which are infinitely more interesting than the things in front of me which must be done...on time hopefully.

There's the new front porch decking design and installation...

Or the new Carport storage/utility closet design...

Or just sitting around on my deck watching the Turbo Pup give the world a good barking while contemplating my belly button...

You get my drift.

I'm so distracted and lazy that I can't even take the time to bitch about the stupid goings on in Washington DC...so I'll leave all of that stuff to you and your own devices.

Time to go do today's crossword puzzle, clip my toe nails, wash a little laundry, do some dishes...

anything but stagger around in my shop looking at electronics will do right now.

Oh...

And Y'all have a LOVELY Saturday...if you will...

Friday, August 13, 2010

I'm Cranky

Missing My Mid-Day Naps...


I have to tell you that this recent bout of working for a living stuff is contrary to my normal demeanor.

Seriously, I can't stop my mind from working long enough to lounge around and do nothing when I intend to any more it seems.

Being awake all of the daylight hours and half of the night is starting to take its toll, and I really have to have a final breakthrough in the next 24 hours and finish a couple of things or a nervous breakdown could result.

Don't make me go all "Jack Nicholson" and fly over to the "Cuckoo's nest" or else...

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Travel Interruptus?

Best Laid Plans...


Dang it.

I've just had to cancel the second pleasure trip in the past month.

All the result of a combination of bad luck, bad planning, and now a relative heavy workload with deadlines slipping past like unset jello between my fingers.

So instead of Pittsburgh for three nights I'll be home here at the Turbo Pup Compound thrashing around on this current PLC panel--still hopefully going out the door today or tomorrow at latest, and now designing a major modification/rebuild of one of my previous panels at the owner's request.

And this latest re-design project has to be completed early to mid next week so the modifications can be completed and the new and improved machine sent back out the door before next Friday.

Thus being out of town tomorrow and next Monday is impossible, so...

Here I sit in front of the computer cancelling hotel reservations and watching the thunderstorms outside my office window.

Time to get back to work I guess...

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

I've Got An Employee Hired A Consultant

Capitulating To My Own Ignorance...


Sorry for not posting earlier, but I've got a meeting here again later this morning at the Turbo Pup Compound at my company's International Headquarters, and I've been up since 5 AM getting ready for the event.

Geez...two meetings in FIVE days....some sort of record I think.

I'm starting to act like I'm actually in business for real or something?

Any way, I've got a software consultant coming over--I've used the guy before back in January--to help me work out a couple of bugs in my PLC program and generally look things over before I put it all in a box tomorrow afternoon and kick it off the FedEX loading dock.

Wish me luck...If you will...

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

It's Obama's "Taxpayer Payback" Time?

We're Reaping The So-Called "Benefits" Of The Government Motors Bailout...


So I was feeling a little lethargic and lazy if not just plain guilty the past couple of weeks because I couldn't get excited enough to deliver a good rant here on the blog.

Not to worry, Ladies and Gentlemen, because when you read this Wall Street Journal (via the American Thinker) story about GM spending $715,000,000 on one of it's Mexican auto plants to produce a new engine and upgrade their production line you're probably gonna be pretty pissed off just like I am this morning:

U.S. automobile giant General Motors Co. said Tuesday it plans to invest close to $500 million in its Ramos Arizpe plant in northern Mexico to produce a new line of engines as well as a new vehicle...

"We estimate that these technologies allow for a 9% improvement in fuel efficiency from current engines," Lieblein said, adding that the investment will directly create 390 jobs in Coahuila state, where Ramos Arizpe is located.

Another $215 million will go toward upgrading the factory's production lines to build a new vehicle for the domestic and international markets, she said, noting that the investment will be key to maintaining 400 jobs.

Assembly of the vehicle, which wasn't named, is set to begin in the last quarter of 2011. GM plans for it to "give long-term viability to this plant by gradually substituting some production volumes."


GM today is apparently as tone deaf as everyone and everything else touched by President Obama and the Obamamaniacs.

The country is going down the crapper for many Americans and Obama not only sends Lady Obama off to France to spend $75,000 a day in vacation dollars in one foreign country, but at the same time lets (or more likely demands) that General Motors send THREE QUARTERS OF A BILLION DOLLARS to Mexico to support manufacturing what we today laughingly call an "American Automobile"?

The good news is that there will be several thousand Mexicans making US dollars without having to walk or swim across our southern border I guess.

And here's another thing to think about which just occurred to me...

How much do you want to bet that the UAW (United Auto Workers) is, as I write this missive, in the process of organizing the workers in Mexico?

That is, if they haven't already got the plant workers paying Union dues.

Imagine the political outcome of Mexican Autoworkers paying dues that come to US Unions, which then turn around and make donations to the Rat Bastard Commie Socialist Democrats.

Yeah...that "Comprehensive Immigration Reform" effort in the Congress is a humanitarian effort and has nothing to do with money.

Dammit...

Monday, August 09, 2010

I'm Thinking About Going Here On Vacation

Budget Travel...





I'll check their prices and let you know in case anyone else is interested.

(Image shamelessly stolen from here )

Six Years Of Bitching In Public Blogging

I Hope It's Been As Much Fun For You As It Has For Me...


It's hard to believe that it was SIX YEARS ago this week I was sitting in a Holiday Inn Crown Plaza in Chicago writing my first couple of blog entries.

Up until a couple of days earlier in August 2004 I had never heard of Google's "Blogger" website which makes it possible for me to do what it is that I do here...

FOR FREE.

Free, that is, if you don't count my time...literally hundreds and hundreds of hours...OK THOUSANDS of hours to date.

Looking at my statistics page here in the Blogger software, this writing represents posting number 2861 on this blog, "What I'd Liked To Have Said", and there's an additional 110 recipes posted over at The Redneck Gourmet.

A pretty amazing body of writing I'd say coming from a guy that absolutely HATED English class in High School and College.

I know that I sometimes take liberties with my grammar and punctuation, and my spelling is less than perfect sometimes even with spellcheck, but still...

Other than a few days here and there when I didn't feel like writing or was just too busy, and a couple of month long stays in the hospital trying to die with blood clots in various parts of my body (and the three month time in the spring of 2007 when I thought I wanted to quit blogging), I've been pretty consistent in recording my attitude and thoughts here in a public forum for all of the world to view if they happen to stop by intentionally or by accident.

I don't write to get a high volume of internet traffic and I don't try to make money blogging, thus the reason you don't see any ads and pop-up banners here on my site.

I write for fun and to stay sane (if anyone could in any way describe me as being lucid) and I write knowing that when I'm long gone from this planet that some of the crap that ends up here will survive and possibly in one hundred years people will stop by and know some crazy guy (that would be me) once lived and breathed and wandered around in the world doing the stuff I've done and written the stuff I've said here.

And for me, that's all I've attempted to get out of this process.

And I hope I've brought a smile to a few peoples' faces and pissed a few people off that deserved it.

And as I said in my subtitle...I hope it's been as much fun for you as it has for me.

Sunday, August 08, 2010

Oops

That's Gonna Leave A Scar...




Ouch...

(and thanks Rodge)

Saturday, August 07, 2010

I Brined My Butt

Now I Need Help Rubbing And Roasting It...Anyone Interested?


OK...Not Really.

I've actually already brined it and rubbed it and now it's laying out on the grill over a pan of water cooking in indirect heat.

MY (Boston) BUTT...that is...

If you want to know how to brine and rub YOUR BUTT...go over HERE to my other blog--"The Redneck Gourmet" and see how many times I can write the word "Butt" in a single recipe.

Time to go check on my Butt now I guess...


Heh

Another "Working" Weekend

The Fruits Of Procrastination And Poor Planning...


Sorry for not posting yesterday, but I had a building full of people here for part of the day at the Turbopup Compound a.k.a. my company's International Headquarters.

And as a result I was up at 4 AM finishing presentation materials and sprucing things up---putting away the Turbo Pup toys and cleaning out the kitchen sink (because you can see it from the dining room conference room table.

The good news is that my ideas were well received, and with any luck after a little polishing I'll have a portable version of my new prototype panel in the hands of my sales partner company by the end of this month.

In the mean time I have three more pneumatic valves to get out the door this week and of course the never ending PLC project is wrapping up and going into a cardboard box before we head out on the road to spend a long weekend in the Pittsburgh, PA area for a wedding celebration.

I walked outside just now and found the weather to be refreshingly cooler this morning, and looking at the NOAA weather website it looks like we have a real nice pool weekend coming up so Pat and Missy the Turbo Pup will have something to do while I have my head stuck in the shop and in front of the computer screen.

I hope Y'all have a LOVELY (and productive if need be) weekend also...

Thursday, August 05, 2010

Too Tired To Complain (Much)

Mental Funk Continues...


It's a rare event when I can't figure out how to do something.

OK...

Open heart surgery, building a manned spacecraft...

I don't do much of that kind of stuff these days, but still.

I've got a few little bitty details to work out still on the latest PLC panel and just like every engineering project, it seems that the last 5% of any given project takes 95% of the time and effort to complete.

That rule is certainly true in my basement these days.

There's plenty of crap going on out there in the news and in the world that makes my ever greying, ever balding head spin (at near orbital rotational velocity), but in an effort to stay focused I've declined to comment.

Let's face it, ladies and gentlemen. We live in a society of people today many of which have lost track of what it means to be an American.

At least an American in the sense of the America I grew up in in the 1960's and 1970's.

If President Kennedy were alive today and he made a speech challenging America to build a spacecraft from scratch and fly to the moon by the end of the decade, you know what?

I don't believe that we could do it.

Again.

Not because we lack the academic acumen to do the work, but because we lack the resolve and political climate to accomplish the task again.

And that's sad.

Very SAD.

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Eat My Dust

YOUR Government Has Lost It's Mind...


Crap like this just makes me crazy.

Did you know that the Imperial Federal Government of the United By-God States of 'Merica, via the Environmental Protection Agency, is considering regulating "Farm Dust" ?


OKLAHOMA CITY -- The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency is considering a crackdown on farm dust, so senators have signed a letter addressing their concerns on the possible regulations.

The letter dated July 23 to the EPA states, "If approved, would establish the most stringent and unparalleled regulation of dust in our nation's history." It further states, "We respect efforts for a clean and healthy environment, but not at the expense of common sense. These identified levels will be extremely burdensome for farmers and livestock producers to attain. Whether its livestock kicking up dust, soybeans being combined on a dry day in the fall, or driving a car down the gravel road, dust is a naturally occurring event."


It's not like that these idiots that can't run a letter delivery system and make a profit (US Postal Service)don't have plenty of important things to worry about.

Things that matter like Radon Gas in your basement or the Ozone Hole or leaking oil wells in the Gulf of Mexico, but these stupid wild eyed suckers are spending time out running around looking for NEW STUFF to regulate.

But Farm Dust?

FARM DUST?

I guess they can add that to the list of crap the sniveling, booger eating, tie died, patchouli stinking hippies have to protest and worry about along with cows belching and farting and odors coming from chicken shit stored on chicken farms.

I swear to God People, if you go out in November and vote to put most of our elected idiots back in office (or worse yet you don't vote at all) you deserve to get a ticket for driving down a dirt road kicking up a dust trail in the process.

I have to go now because my head hurts just thinking about this idocy.

Dead In The Water

Paralyzed With Indecision...


Dang it...I can't seem to get crap anything useful accomplished the past few days.

OK, I've got some paper work done and put together some pricing on a new product I'm developing, but tangible, paying, work production has been limited.

And I'm going to get my tail in a crack shortly if I don't get this PLC panel out the door this week, but my head just isn't into the process right now for some reason.

Every thing's installed and working...sort of...but the fine tuning process is tedious and I still have to finish up the users' manual and working on stuff like this solo just further complicates things.

Owning the business, I can pretty much do whatever I want to do without having to deal with a "committee"...it's just figuring out what exactly to do that's the problem sometimes.

For instance, I suggest that you don't do anything like this...



That's hilarious, and I think I'll go do some laundry now...

Monday, August 02, 2010

I'm Your Huckleberry...Part Deaux

The Latest "Cone Of Death" Approaches...




...And the sniveling tie died patchouli stinking booger eaters rejoice...


I TOLD YOU SO...


(and you're welcome)

Sunday, August 01, 2010

Let The Cape Verde Hurricane Season Begin...

My Head Already Hurts




So it's August 1st, and the "Cape Verde" part of the 2010 Hurricane season will be getting into full swing in the next couple of weeks.

Look forward to the Atlantic Trade winds, as they have for the past zillion years, delivering the waves of moisture which come off of the African Continent across the Atlantic and with some miraculous combination of upper level highs and low pressure systems we here in the Southeastern US and the Central American region will get to enjoy the results of the atmosphere redistributing the heat and moisture in the process.

And the sniveling tree hugging booger eater global warming fanatics will sit around in their tie died shirts stinking of Patchouli and chanting "Death to Bush and Cheney" and the talking weather heads will tell you that we're all doomed and in the mean time I'm here to tell you...

It's AUGUST people...

On and near the US Gulf Coast...

And the wind is going to blow and the rain is going to fall just like it has pretty much every F**king year for the last million years since the Good Lord created the planet.

So get over it...

...Dammit...

"Come To The USA"

Leave It To Ray Stevens To Say It...




Heh...

Saturday, July 31, 2010

I'm Your Huckleberry

Rambling Commentary On World Events


Oh...where to start this morning?

I'm sort of wild eyed and a little grumpy because I'm going to work through the weekend getting things done I couldn't or didn't manage to do last week, so...

Should I write about the hilarious antics of the Niggras Negros Blacks African Americans members of the Congressional Black Caucus up in DC getting their sorry race baiting demagogue butts into ethics hearings?

Waters and Rangel should have been tossed out on their stupid black rear ends 20 years ago but because of their color no one was willing to call them on their illegal deeds without risking being called "racist".

As the old saying goes..."give an idiot enough rope and they will eventually hang themselves with it"...

Or maybe I'll write about General Motors...aka "Government Motors" getting all the Obamamaniacs astir with the introduction of a $41,000 electric car--the "Volt"--with the interior room to accommodate four midgets and a capability of going 40 MILES before having to fire up the gasoline engine and burn only premium gasoline for the next 300 plus miles.

And then of course since it's summer and it hasn't rained in LA since February, it's big news that most of southern California has burst into flame and is chasing people out of their homes and businesses while the idiot reporters in the newspapers and on the TV act like it's never ever happened before.

Or maybe I'll predict that in the next two weeks that 2 or 3 decent sized tropical events will occur in the Caribbean/Gulf of Mexico and every single person working at ABC/CBS/NBC/CNN/MSNBC and the ASSociated press will lose their minds and proclaim doom and gloom and death and destruction because of the Bush Tax Cuts causing Global Warming...and the storms will disproportionately affect minorities and women.

But then again, I'm busy and don't have time to tell you what I really think.

Y'all have a LOVELY Saturday.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Blogging For Blogging's Sake

Words Tumbling Out Onto The Keyboard...


I've got so much stuff going on around here these days I've missed my mid morning nap three of the past four days.

Today looks like it will be day five based on what I see looking at my "to-do" list.

I managed to get four more pneumatic valves out the door yesterday bringing this week's total to eight, and I have three more "master rebuilds" to do next week once the piston shafts come back from the chrome shop and are re-ground to tolerance.

And of course the new PLC panel is still snorting and banging around in the shop waiting on the final software revisions and...

you get my drift...

So I'm going to go now and finish reading the news and getting ready for another eight or ten hour day of beating my head against a computer screen.

Regards Y'all...

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Ummmmmmmm...

Errrrrrrrrrr....


Sorry Ladies and Gentlemens, but I'm REAL busy.

Blog more later.

(If anyone knows about Photovoltaic Cells give me a ring.)

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Eighty Eight Thousand...Eight Hundred And Eighty Eight Hits

Thanks For Reading


Click on the image for photographic evidence...



An International Dispute In My Basement?

15 Hour Days = No Blogging


Sorry for missing a day of blogging yesterday, but I have a good excuse involving "professional obligations." (and the people that know me in real life are laughing their rear ends off right now when I include "professional" in the same sentence with reference to myself.)

Any way, for some reason I went out in June and sold this touch screen PLC based sensor system which has to measure the temperature of a product on a production line moving past at a rate of as fast as 22,000 units per hour.

Yes, you heard me right ...TWENTY TWO THOUSAND PER HOUR.

Doing the math for those of you that went to FSU and UGA, that's a little over 6 times per SECOND that something comes flying past my two non-contact infrared temperature sensors. (Non contact IR Sensors are expensive...and that's all you need to know if you're not an injuneer.)

I'm using "non-contact" type sensors because obviously you can't actually touch something moving that fast to determine it's temperature because either you or it would get hurt in the process.

Got it?

Then to complicate things further, the customer's existing process is smart and can throttle it's speed downward by about 50% if things start backing up in packaging or somewhere else on the line, and this makes it hard to tell where the bad product my temperature sensors have detected is located afterward because my system is supposed to "kick" the offending product off the line before it gets mixed in with all of the other good product.

You might think that's a hard standard, but believe me it's even HARDER than you think at these speeds...particularly since you can't just guess how fast it's moving.

You have to KNOW...

Exactly.

Then, as my title suggests, I'm having trouble getting all of the sensors to get along because they're from different manufacturers.

But hey...all three are all built in Germany, and I thought that by default that they'd all speak the same language and all I needed was a good translator so that I could understand what they were saying and things would be good.

But NooooooOOOOOOO...

I'm not sure what it is...maybe the guys that designed my proximity sensors are fans of a different Rugby or Soccer team from the ones designing my IR sensors or something.

And my PLC was made here in the good old United By-God States of 'Merica (by non-union employees...I've been to the factory) and everyone knows how most Germans feel about Americans.

And with the switches and warning lights made in China and Taiwan and some of the other stuff made in Costa Rica, it almost seems like that for the past month I've had a regular United Nations Security Council sub-committee meeting going on in my shop inside a 16" x 20" x 8" steel box.

And apparently up until now, everybody gets to vote but ME.

I just spent about 22 hours over the past two days trying to "sprint to the finish line" on this project and late yesterday I think I had my final breakthrough on getting everyone to agree to work together and not pass any resolutions against the US and more specifically, anyone living here at the Turbo Pup Compound.

In the interest of diversity the Council demanded I get some woman's involvement into the process, so Pat looked at everything and was impressed and said it looked "cool".

And little Missy the Turbo Pup's a girl puppy, so I'm gonna hold her up to the front of the cabinet today and let her put a good puppy "snoogh" right in the middle of the touch screen.

Unfortunately I was unable to comply with the racial diversity part of their request because I don't know any African Americans here in Knoxtown with PLC programming skills.

I told them that the Chief plant electrician at my customer's facility is a very competent Black guy so the Chinese talked the Germans into letting me off the hook on that one.

So now, Ladies and Gentlemen, having explained where I've been for the past 48 hours, I'm going to collapse back into a coma for another two or three hours before getting back downstairs to make sure one group of parts hasn't started another war with the other groups.

Regards Y'all...

Monday, July 26, 2010

"Above Average" Hurricane Season?

Sniveling Global Warming Weenies Weep In Their Tofu...


I want to remind everyone that after eight weeks on the Hurricane calendar we've only had TWO named storms this season.

And here's the current forcast map:



Probably going to be an exciting August and September based on the law of averages, but still...

Sunday, July 25, 2010

I Need An "Electronics Exorcist"

My Shop Is Haunted...


So I cooked bar-B-que ribs and fresh corn on the cob and new potatoes for dinner last night after basking on the deck like a lizard for most of the afternoon.

Smoked my last cigar and sweated on the newspaper did most of the crossword in the process, and I vaguely recall some Vodka in the form of "Seabreezes" crossing my lips once or twice...OK...maybe four or five times.

Then I collapsed into bed before dark but then by 3 AM I was half awake and puzzling over the final details of this stupid PLC programming exercise I'm going through.

I finally gave up sleeping any longer and stumbled down into the basement and by 5AM I had managed to go backwards to about where I was last Thursday.

For some reason the Laptop computer and the PLC got together and decided to barf up every time I tried to download my revised code saying there were errors in instructions I hadn't changed in over a week.

So I had to go back to Wednesday's version of the program and then reconstruct all of the code and screen edits I had done, and now at 8 AM I'm back to slightly ahead of where I started at 3 AM.

If you're not a programmer you can just think I'm sloppy or crazy, but the people out there that live working on the inner thought processes of all of the machines which we take for granted today know that many if not most are like spoiled "mentally challenged" children.

They don't know how to do anything and they spend most of their time unable to understand else just plain ignoring instructions on how to do whatever it is you're trying to get them to do.

I spend half my time ready to throw everything out in the yard and the other half celebrating some small victory which many times is only short lived.

Any way...my brain is fried for the time being...

...so I think it's time to go out while the temperature is still under 100 degrees and fire up the weed eater and wake up the neighbors early on a Sunday morning.

Regards Y'all...

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Ashes To Ashes...Dust To Dust...

You Drink Good Beer Vodka...Your Pipes Won't Rust...


It's "Pool Time" this afternoon here at the Turbo Pup Compound.

It's too dang hot to do anything else except possibly sit inside in the AC, but I've been up since 3 AM working, then made a run to Staples and WalMart, dumped a bunch of cardboard and newspapers off at the recycling center, and cooked brunch.

All before 11:30 AM.

On a Saturday.

I pretty much treat every day on the calendar like it's Saturday AND a work day and then just get whatever I can done along the way.

The only difference between a real Saturday and a work day is that I can't find anyone to talk to on the telephone because all of the 9 to 5 working stiffs are at home hiding from the telephone and business concerns.

I can't and don't operate like that for some un-Godly reason.

It started out intentional but now it's so ingraned into my soul and spirit that I can't do things any other way.

I have an owner's/operations manual to finish writing and some programming tidbits to finish up and there's still a stack of pneumatic valves to finish up, but right now I want to go smoke the last cigar I have in the Humidor and read today's paper while baking on the deck.

Y'all have a LOVELY weekend...

Friday, July 23, 2010

I'm Half Way Making A Living...

Or Is it Making Half A Living?


Well Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm pleased to report that things have settled down a little this week finally here at the Turbo Pup Compound on the Banks of the Mighty Tennessee River.

We have the calendar schedule for the next couple of months pretty much worked out as of today, and between me pounding on the new PLC panel trying to teach it how to read three expensive non-contact sensors and time spent throwing pneumatic valve parts into a solvent bath I have a nice reasonable work load for most of the next week or so.

But then just when I get my Karma straightened out I have to wander into the dining room and sit at the table and screw around with tax forms for the State of Tennessee and the Imperial Federal Government of the United By-God States of 'Merica.

That's right, I have to close the books on the second quarter of 2010 and make sure I don't do anything wrong or fail to file some piece of paper which would cause the bureaucrats to come after me and my wallet.

It's a total bitch having to waste perfectly good time where I could be sleeping or goofing around doing nothing--or better yet making money--screwing around with government paperwork.

And you just wait until 2012 when one of the new hidden provisions of the "Obamacare" health care legislation kicks in and business start having to provide a 1099 Form to every single supplier that they spend over $600 in a calendar year.

I was just doing the math here and right now I'd have to write no less than a dozen forms and my company is only nine months old and we have no real employees (we have me and my partner as slaves) and we haven't billed $100K yet this year.

It's really unfortunate that we've gotten to the point where the stupid shitheads in the government treat most of the population as "subjects" and the higher earners as "income sources" these days.

People fall into two broad categories and generally vote "D" or "R" accordingly.

Either you are on the dole getting welfare and/or food stamps and/or WIC and/or Medicade and "earned income" credits--spending your life having kids you can't afford while living a lifestyle you can't support, else you're a member of the EVIL rich class of citizens who's job it is, according to the politicians and "social wellfare experts" to work their ass off and then send 30% to 39% of their largess to the government to fund their idiocy and vote buying "social programs."

For some strange reason--it's either genetic or just simple insanity--I keep aspiring to earn the sort of income which will put me in the government gun sights as a member of the "EVIL RICH."

I'd go have my head examined to see why I suffer from this affliction but I'd probably just break the Cat Scanner or MRI and then they'd send me a bill for that also.

So I just stay home and thrash around and write here on this blog...

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Uncle Virgil's Protege

Driving A Firebird Rather Than A Camaro....


Here's some video of a friend/former college roomate's son doing the weekend drag racing thing over in North Carolina.



I did burnouts in front of the church at his parent's wedding in my firethorn red 1977 Camaro way back in 1981.

They say I wore off on him in some sort of demented way in the process....

Go figure?

I'm Over Run With Vegetables

"Garden Takes Over Knoxville Man's Property..."


I have to admit that, while I grew up visiting my Grandfather's farm every summer back in the 1960's and early 1970's, that doesn't make me a farmer any more that having attended a bunch of Atlanta Braves games makes me a professional Baseball Player.

I present this season's garden as evidence of my inability.

It's not that I'm not getting fruit and vegetables out of the dirt as a result of my efforts...

It's that the garden has literally taken over my back yard, and the areas where the garden isn't growing I've let the weeds get out of control so the whole thing looks like some sort of scene out of a Star Trek movie.

You know, the one where Mr. Spock dies and Kirk launches his body and this "Genesis Device" down to a barren planet and the planet grows into a lush rain forest and Mr. Spock comes back to life in the process.

I wish Mr. Spock (or Dr. Spock or Old McDonald) would show up here with a Weed Eater and a Hoe and help me get things under control.

I harvested a dozen tomatoes yesterday and a couple of cucumbers, so now I have about four dozen tomatoes laying around and a couple of dozen cucumbers waiting to be processed.

I eat tomatoes on cereal and peanut butter sandwiches these days to get rid of them and I've got funky jars of vinegar and spices I keep slicing cucumbers into to make quick pickles and I still can't keep up with the process.

My neighbors lock their doors and pull their curtains when they see me coming with a Kroger bag bulging with stuff.

All of this from about ten tomato plants and two cucumber vines.

And now my Japanese Eggplant and Squash are starting to come in and I'm actually afraid to walk out in the back yard because instead of just sitting around smoking a cigar and reading the paper I have to WORK when I get out there.

I was going to run the weed eater yesterday and try to knock some stuff down around the plants and a rain storm snuck up on me and it sprinkled on and off for most of the afternoon and by then it was too wet to work outside.

The Herb garden is also rocking and rolling and my Pumpkin and Watermelon vines are crawling all over the place and my pitiful little bell and sweet pepper plants are even starting to have near edible stuff on them and...

...you get my drift.

There's worse things to happen I guess than to have more stuff than you can freeze and eat...all from an ameteur farmer.

(Oh, by the way, the PLC panel is alive now and absorbing electricity and new software but still belching and farting a little yet, so it's time to go back to work I guess.)

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

My Brain Is Fried

Killing Me Softly...


So as my regular lurkers readers know, I've got this project going on in my basement laboratory which is kicking my butt right now.

It's not that it's so difficult building a single PLC panel, it's that I'm having to build the panel in a manner such that I can reproduce it again--EXACTLY-- in a couple of months.

Instead of just throwing a power supply and a surge suppression system and an uninterruptable battery back up system into a box with a touch screen PLC and a bunch or wires and DIN rail and terminal strips, I'm trying to in the process develop a whole new product line around the design making room for future options and as yet unknown variations.

I'm basically thinking six months to a year down the road on the calendar and the expandability and future uses are more work than the metal box of wire I'm spending twelve to fourteen hours a day looking at on my workbench.

A lot of people that are not an engineers think that we're all like "The Professor" on the TV show "Gilligan's Island" and that we know everything about anything by the time we finish four years (or in my case ten years full and part time) of college.

Not so.

I seem to forget that fact myself sometimes when I go out and write a proposal and then manage to get a purchase order for some monstrosity a customer wants to buy.

Thus yet again this morning I'm too mentally tired and lazy to write much of anything beyond what you see here.

Time for a nap I guess before getting up and doing it all over again I guess...

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

What Kind Of Conservative Are You?

I Knew It All Along...



Quiz: What Kind of Conservative Are You?

My Conservative Identity:

You are an Anti-government Gunslinger, also known as a libertarian conservative or Tea Partier. You believe in smaller government, states’ rights, gun rights, and that, as Reagan once said, "The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’"




Go here and take the test yourself...

Heh...

The Silence Of The Lambs Is Deafening

Got To Do The Work When The Work Needs Do'in...

Sorry I didn't write anything yesterday, but I have bad news, Ladies and Gentlemen...

We've had to cancel our long planned visit to lower Alabama next week because of so-called "professional" obligations.

Pat has to go to Chicago for the "kick off meeting" with a new medical client and I'm up to my ears in PLC Panel details and pneumatic valves, thus getting the Turbo Pup and her Lockers and Sea Chests loaded up and into the car around the revised schedule just isn't going to work out.

Dang it...

I can spend weeks on the calendar with little if nothing to do, and darn it if things won't come wandering in the door and screw everything up at the last minute.

This late summer delay is a perfect example.

Almost everyone else I know has taken a week vacation already, but me and Pat and the Turbo Pup have stayed home since Memorial Day.

Now we have planned and wanted to go south in the late summer, but now having to earn a living and the professional obligations associated therewith takes precedence over pleasure and family obligations for the time being.

Oh well...

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Up To My Ears In Work

And I'm Leaving Town Soon...So I Have Real "Deadlines"?


I'm sitting here this morning looking at another shipment of eight fancy pneumatic valves which are in desperate need of rebuilding.

They arrived unexpectedly Saturday morning.

It's a good news/bad news sort of thing because now, in addition to trying to finish up the current PLC project before heading down to Lower Alabama for 10 days or so now I have to get the valves torn down, cleaned up, and rebuilt and back out the door in the process before Friday.

It's sad not having anything in the way of paying work to do, but I wish that my paying work would spread itself out a little such that I don't have to go from sitting around picking my nose and smoking cigars on the deck beside the Turbo Pup Pool to working my butt off and causing what's left of the hair on the top the back and sides of my ever greying, ever balding head from falling out in the process.

I see that the Sunday newspaper's here, so in my normal devil may care manner I'm going to go fire up a cigar and take a first look at the NY Times' crossword.

Regard's Y'all...

Saturday, July 17, 2010

3 AM Cigar On The Sidewalk Front Porch Anyone?

Bring Your Pen And Crossword Puzzle And Meet Me There...


I'm just worn out from Injuneering most of the week and feeling so lazy this morning there should be some sort of a law against it, but I don't feel like going to the bed or sofa to nap right now.

I have a little wine buzz and a virgin crossword puzzle from today's newspaper which I never got to and there are at least another three or four cigars in my Humidor left over so...

I'm going out front to listen to some James Taylor music on the portable CD player and find a way to employ a cigar and crossword in a semi-useful fashion.

Wish me luck...If you will...

(Oh...and I hope Y'all have a LOVELY Saturday...)

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Congressional "Hearings"

I Think That These Idiots Mostly Have a Bad Case of "Hearing AIDS"


I've been meaning to mention this for a while now but by the time I wandered from the TV to the Fridge to refresh my drink and made it back to the computer keyboard I had forgotten half the things that I wanted to complain about...

and this morning I remembered it finally because Matt Drudge over at Drudge Report had a link to this story about the current Congressional Freak Show going on with the elected idiots calling the owners of private businesses--in this case Airlines--to Washington DC in order to question them about their pricing practices.


Let me say "THIS" about "THAT"...

("THAT" Being Congress having the audacity to once again try to tell managers and stockholders how to run their businesses)

I've spent a buttload of money and time flying on commercial aircraft since about 1978 right after they "deregulated" the US airlines.

When I started flying almost everyone took a bath and dressed up in a suit and tie before they came to the airport and every flight over the length of about 15 minutes included a three course meal and two martinis.

Just around then they had already "de-regulated" the airlines and under the auspices of President Jimmuh "smile when you say that" Carter it proceeded to become a strange new uncharted world in the airline industry.

Since then, just like riding on a NY Subway or a MARTA train in Atlanta or Amtrak or a Greyhound bus cross country, the lower fares offered by the airlines have resulted in the average business traveler being subjected to a large slice of humanity which many times should be sequestered living in a Circus Freak Show rather than flying along at 33,000 feet complaining because they had to pay extra to bring their Trampoline, Bong, Trombone and a box of rotting Organic Vegetables on board to stow in the overhead compartments for free.

And don't even get me started writing about having to sit beside a sweaty "super sized" man in a Addis Tank Top that oozes and overflows over my armrest and into the isle.

Here's the bottom line.

Jet aircraft cost money, and have limited range and capacity based on the weight and contents contained therein.

Further, flying said weight and contents and loading and unloading same costs airlines money in the form of fuel costs and wear and tear on the airframe.

It's just that simple.

Thus, in my considered Redneck opinion I don't mind walking up to the check in counter (fully clothed) with my laptop bag and boarding a plane for $xxx.xx while the person beside me hanging over the armrests smoking the bong, playing the Trombone, and jumping on the carry on Trampoline pays $50 or $100 extra for the service provided.

Likewise, when I board an airliner with a week worth of clothes and scuba gear in checked baggage and a case of duty free Jamaican Rum and a decorated Coconut in my carry on bag I don't consider it unreasonable to be charged extra for my presence between the upright seat backs and tray tables (I've done something similar to that a couple of times years ago.)

Everyone should just shut up and get over their government inspired beliefs that they now have a right to cheap air travel just like free healthcare and all of the other crap the Imperial Federal Government of the By-God United States of 'Merica wants to promise today.

The airlines are a business, and they have the right to fail or succeed based on the decisions of their management and their stockholders...

not the whims of some bald headed elected Congressional asshole listening to the whining of people that have the option of walking or riding a horse or driving or riding Greyhound or Amtrak to get to where ever it is they are going...

or how about them just staying home smoking their bong and jumping on their Trampoline and letting me enjoy my cheap flight.

Is it just Me?

Takin' The Morning Off Again Today...

I'm Playing In Watching The British Open


Here's a look at what I'd probably look like if I played golf...







Heh...

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Life Is...

What You Make Of It I guess...


I'm sorry to say that I'm a bit short on words this morning.

Nothing really that serious by many people's standards or medical or anything like that, but I was slammed with a professional setback yesterday that has me once again having to re-evaluate my future.

AGAIN...

I'm getting too old for this stuff in a way, but then after owning four different corporations with two different business partners over the past 20 years I should know by now that no matter what...

Anything is possible.

Just like piloting an airplane solo (which I have) or sailing a ship solo offshore out of sight of land (which I have), when you start getting all comfortable and cozy and think you have things under control and you know what you're doing...WHAM...

Storm clouds pop up on the horizon and you have to make critical choices.

Turn back to port?

Try to go around the storm?

Or just maintain your course and heading and sail right through the rain and wind and waves and hail.

Right now I have the throttle wide open and I'm holding my course because I've come too far to turn back or change direction right now.

I just didn't have this situation on the radar until the past week and it's turned out to be a bumpy ride.

I'll get through it...wish me luck...if you will, and I'll be back here later with some more ranting and raving when I have the time.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

New Underwear

Boxers Or Briefs?


So I was sitting here this morning looking at my "middle aged to-do" list.

By "middle aged" I don't mean anything like a "bucket list" where you write down the stuff you do before you die.

MY PERSONAL "middle aged to-do" list...something of my own creation every week or so...includes things like this (and I'm not making this up):

#1 Shave/Trim Beard

#2 Build 4 valves

#3 Pool Filter Parts

#4 Cut Tree off of Roof

#5 Underwear

#6 Cologne

#7 Black Ink Cartridge

There was some other personal and professional (or un-professional depending on your point of view) stuff on there I'm omitting this morning for the purposes of clarity and brevity and because I don't want anyone thinking "eewwwwwwww" but still...

Seriously...

I have deodorant, so don't be too afraid but I am out of Cologne right now and have been for several weeks.

Comes from being old and in a relationship I guess.

And I have underwear and some most of the time it's clean but right now ladies and gentlemen, if I were ever to be in an automobile accident or just have a stroke and drop down half dead in public, my MOTHER would be thinking she hadn't raised her son right due to the number of holes and the amount of elastic showing around the waistband ( or on underwear is it wasteband? ) on many of the pairs.

Wait a minute...changing the subject "briefly" (excuse the pun), but why is it a "pair" of underwear when if you are a man it's a single item?

I can see where a women might wear a "pair" of underwear (if she wore any at all) and that would be panties and a bra, but with men it's different, and I haven't gotten large enough yet in my ever growing girth to need or want to wear a bra and even if they start making "men's bras" I'll just go in for my first Tummy Tuck and get the discount breast reduction surgery option while I'm at it.

Got it? OK...back to my original train wreck of thought...so I'm out of Cologne and getting close to being short of inventory in the underwear department, but you know what else?

I absolutely hate going to the mall.

Further, I hate shopping for clothes in general. I don't even look at clothing sites on the Internet unless I have to.

I wish Home Depot and Lowe's sold more clothes (I bought a set of overalls from Home Depot.) so I could pick up potted plants and fertilizer and sixteen penny nails and a three pack of size 38 briefs in Home Depot Orange color and just be done with it.

And that brings up another thing...Is it against the law in Tennessee to have an integral "nail pouch" on underwear....wait no...we won't go there...never mind...

That was the only dang thing I really liked about being in the military was that if you would take care of them and wash and iron or send out to the dry cleaners the Navy would FIX YOU UP with some spiffy sets of clothes.

For FREE.

Underwear included.

And that White Dress Uniform like Richard Gere wore in "Officer and A Gentleman" would get most men ten dates in about five seconds from women they had never ever seen before in their entire lives.

Unfortunately I was such a skinny young dork at the time that my dorkdom more than offset the "chick magnet" factor of the Dress Whites but still...

So back to our story...I'm sitting here this morning procrastinating and avoiding going down into the shop where I should be working right now instead of blogging by making out my newest "middle aged to-do list" and trying to catch up, and dang it if cologne and underwear aren't still on this list just like the were when I wrote the last to-do list on June 16th.

Imagine that?

But you'll be happy to know that I did build the valves and I've shaved several times since then, and my printer will print things using black ink now.

Oh...and the tree is long gone off the roof.

But I swear to God that these day's if I don't write things down I've forgotten more stuff than many people ever knew, and I don't know what I know and that I know it unless I write it down.

If someone came to my house and stole my list(s) I'd probably be found a few weeks later, lost, and wandering somewhere in north Alabama looking for Boxer Shorts and some Old Spice.

Can anyone help me?

I hope this rant gives you a chuckle, and y'all have a LOVELY day now...if you will...(I got to go work on a PLC panel)

Monday, July 12, 2010

"Walkin' In Memphis"

New Karaoke Aspirations...


If you have about five minutes listen to Marc Cohn Sing one of my favorites...



I'm working on the song a few steps lower in key...and I'm gonna sing it in public one day but it's a tough one.

It Rained On My Garden

...And I'm One Happy Camper As A Result....


Just in case I haven't mentioned it here on the blog in detail, I come from a proud yet mixed heritage. A combination of rural southern dirt farmers, with a healthy dose of Appalachian coal miner thrown in for good measure.

For some reason I, personally, developed a bit of a useless, ne'er do well, gypsy, pirate beach-bum spirit along the way but by and large I can't blame my ancestors for my own lethargy.

My Mother's father, "Pa" Rushing, ended up owning a farm which encompassed a little over 350 acres by the end of WWII and on that farm--besides all of the stuff "Old McDonald" raised i.e. chickens and cows and hogs et.al.-- he also managed to feed himself and his wife and five children and make a small living in the process.

Four of the five children are still alive today with the youngest in his early 70's.

On the other hand, "PawPaw" Rogers was a coal miner from his early teens. First in Eastern Kentucky, and then later in Central West Virginia and finally at the end of his career in South Eastern Ohio. PawPaw raised three boys digging and managing the digging of coal...him being Virgil Sr. and my father being Virgil Jr. and I Virgil III, and regretably only one brother remains today with the loss of my father and one uncle.

(And I, thinking that I had perfected the product line in my youthful wisdom, broke the mold and elected to not reproduce...thus there is no Virgil number IV or V or XI or MCMXII)

...but I digress

I was standing in my kitchen this morning looking at a pile of Tomatoes and Squash and Cucumbers I had grown in my little garden when out of the blue it occurred to me that the commonality which connects each side of my family was and is our self sufficiency and making a living in a fundamental manner.

Pa Rushing took seeds and dirt and water and made fruit and vegetables and meat...enough to feed his family at each year with enough left over to at least buy the next season's seed.

Pawpaw Rogers went out and worked in almost every part of the process of digging Coal out of the ground (he was the Electrical Superintendent of the Mine when he retired) so it could be said again that his living and prosperity was attained from the EARTH...or at least the dirt within a few miles of the surface thereof.

And I think that revelation could explain somewhat what's wrong with much of American society today...white, black, yellow, red, and heavily tattooed and pierced...We've lost our connection with the earth.

The sniveling, booger eating, patchouli stinking tree huggers want to protect it (the earth), but they forget in the process that we're all going to end up taking something from it in the process of living if we all want to survive.

Things like...

Oil

Coal

Or how about the basic nutrients required to grow crops and livestock (and they don't want us making Fertilizer because they consider it poison)

And when our lives are over with...in biblical terms...we will die and return in a "ashes to ashes, dust to dust" manner to the earth (and the area within five square miles around where my ashes are spread will probably be declared off limits and an EPA superfund site.)

And the thing this morning which has in my considered Redneck opinion been taken by the liberal elites and professional do-gooders and the politicians from most of the innocent an less enlightened citizens--with the "Urbanization of America"--and which by default also from our society...

is the basic, spiritual, fundamental connection with our planet which gives you life and an inner peace...a peace which is missing from so many peoples lives today.

Seriously, I've had more fun planting and harvesting and eating the fruits of my garden this year than I could ever have had spending thousands and thousands of dollars on some "All inclusive" vacation or whatever. A new car has never ever made me feel the way I feel when I wander out each moring in my flip flops and turn the leaves of the Squash and Cucumber plants over and find something to eat.

And you just wait until I start showing pictures of my Watermellons.

Anyway..this morning I feel like I just might be a little bit better of a man today as a result, and I suggest that everybody that's not feeling right go out in play in the dirt if they need a cure.

Time will tell I guess...

Sunday, July 11, 2010

I'm Tired Of People Hitting "Home Runs" At My Expense

Liberal Philanthropic Government Bullshit


I just saw Geraldo "Giant Stinky Mustache" Rivera saying on FOX News that the government was going to pay Jacee Dugard a giant compensation settlement of $20,000,000 because the "officials" botched the investigation of her imprisonment/disappearance at the hands of a idiot pervert sexual predator.

I'm sorry, and I feel sorry for everyone who has something like this happen, and people killed in the 9/11 World Trade Center bombing and now the Gulf Oil spill disaster, but this shit drives me crazy.

If I lose my job because of government ineptitude/market conditions because I'm selling saddles and buggy whips when everyone starts driving cars...I don't feel that I want or need to get a check.

If I have my head beat in in a Pizza Hut in 1979 the government doesn't have to come running to me with a cash settlement even though the City of Atlanta's inept police department can't do much of anything but prosecute murders after the fact and write parking and speeding tickets and arrest people for DUI after having consumed three glasses of wine.

If someone breaks into my home or car or trailer in college I don't go with my hand out expecting the government to hand me compensation for the event.

You do realize that the GOVERNMENT has NO MONEY?

They print it, but they don't own any of it until they take it away from someone and give it to someone else.

In other words, the only money the government has it steals from other people and distributes as it sees fit and based on popular opinion.

And one person killed or maimed is sad but unprofitable, but getting involved in a mass terrorist attack or assaulted by a pervert can apparently today be a very profitable profession.

Thus if you die in a car accident in 2001 you get no check consisting of taxpayer money, but if you have the misfortune of dieing when some wild eyed terrorists flings a commercial airliner into a building and you inhale a little smoke or if you manage to DIE your family hits the JACKPOT?

And then there was the double disaster of Katrina where people are still living on the government dole five years later and now this year if you are a fisherman or crabber or have a hotel or other business supported by tourism on the gulf coast you can run crying to the government and demand a payment...and BP's money isn't the only money being spent in the "compensation programs."

No way no how EVER can there not be taxpayer money involved in the administration of the oil spill "reparations."

People who live in Nevada and never saw a fishing boat in their life except on TV or the Movies will be cashing checks and going to gambling parlors and whorehouses using some of your and my money because the government in it's infinite Imperialistic wisdom doesn't have the ability to make toothpicks let alone distribute $20 billion without screwing up 30% of the process.

Using my money.

And now if you happen to be kidnapped by a known sexual predator and held hostage in the state of California...a state that is already widely known to already be BANKRUPT...you can reach a settlement where the inept government that is in the business of stealing hard working peoples' money and wasting it doing a crap job of law enforcement and worrying about the trans-fats in McDonald's Cheeseburgers and French Fries, win a prize and get $20,000,000 at taxpayer expense...

Not G O V E R N M E N T expense...DAMMIT.

Again I feel sorry for the girl, but TWENTY MILLION?

I guarandamntee you the girl wouldn't have probably earned $50K a year for the past ten years and now instead of $500K before taxes she gets TWENTY MILLION DOLLARS OF OTHER PEOPLES MONEY?

What a program...

Is there a list somewhere where I can sign up to be assaulted with a non lethal crime and then set and snivel and blubber my way into your wallet to the tune of thirty or forty times more than my life would be worth otherwise?

I'm old enought now to actually consider taking that option if it were available.

Is it just me?

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Blackwater Grill on St. Simons Island

I Hang Out With Celebrities???


I'm remiss in not yet mentioning earlier that my buddies John and Jamie, Owners and Chef at Blackwater Grill, finally were broadcast this week on Food Network.

Unfortunately we were already going to be in town for the SSI Red Hot Chili Cook off that next week so we couldn't come down for the filming last April...i.e. you won't have to look at my silly butt in the show...but if you're a Food Network Junkie and watch the re-runs of "Diners, Drive-In's, and Dives" this weekend you might catch a glimpse of our favorite restaurant on our little island.

I've been the guest Chef and cooked with John and Jamie the past two years in the Chili event to raise money for charities and have an invitation to do it again next spring. My cooking skills pale in comparison to their capabilities but as a team we've won Second Place People's Choice two years ago and and are going to keep on trying for First Place.

It's nice when good things happen to good people, and I just talked to Jamie and he says that the Restaurant has enjoyed a substantial increase in business as a result of the TV show exposure.

People are waiting in line, but I can always have table 23 in the back corner next to the marsh.

It's S A T U R D A Y ! ! !

I Hope You Enjoy Yours As Much As I Plan On Enjoying Mine...


I, like most everyone, have a bunch of crap to do this weekend, but I have all weekend to do it so I plan on making a conscious effort at having a good time in the process.

And the weather cooled off here in eastern Tennessee Friday by about 10 degrees F and it rained for a few hours late in the afternoon so I didn't have to run the sprinklers on the garden and front lawn.

I basically plan on getting along knowing I live in the greatest county in the world no matter what the sniveling, tree hugging, booger eating, bed wetting liberal/progressives try to do to it.

Any other option for me means that they win the struggle...

How about you?

Friday, July 09, 2010

The Turbo Pup's Summer Vacation

That's a Darn Fine Little Dog We Got Right There...

So I was sitting around a couple of weeks ago after the tree fell on the roof and the power and phones and Internet was off about 10 hours working like Abe Lincoln using candles and a real oil burning lamp for light



...when I came up with this idea...



Using the tanks of two old cheap pool filters and a new pump and some PVC pipe to make a filter that really works for the pool this little girl enjoys almost every day...



After which on most Saturdays or Sundays she enjoys some of my soon to be internationally famous home made pizzas with my super secret custom crust formula...



And then tonight I put together this monstrosity:



That would be the prototype of my latest engineering design for an uninterpretable power supply for some stuff I'm doing this fall, for the exclusive purpose of maintaining little Missy the Turbo Pup's lifestyle.

I've got over 20 hours in the design and about six hours tonight drilling holes and wiring everything together, so you'll have to excuse me now while I go and lapse into a coma for a few hours.

Regards Y'all...

Thursday, July 08, 2010

Big Toe Here...Just Checkin' In

Basement Full Of Stuff To Do...


OK, our house guests just left town a little before noon this morning after an interesting week, and things have quietened down a good deal and the Turbo Pup and I are concentrating on getting back into our ritual of doing nothing all day.

Almost...and after having a week living with a little girl that turns two years old later this month and has a squeal---happy none the less---but a squeal that will shatter the glass headlights in your car and the glass full of vodka in your hand from a distance of somewhere between one hundred and one hundred and twenty five yards.

Whew....

And then this afternoon my replacement Hoffmann electrical enclosure panel and back plate FINALLY showed up so now I'm back in the Programmable Logic Controller business again full time for the next three or four days (after a near week delay) so only God knows what you'll be reading and seeing here on this little slice of the Internet I call home.

I could go crazy and write a bunch of new original stuff or I might fall back on posting links to things I see and read when I have a moment...

and then again you might not find anything at all new here because I'm tired and concentrating on making some semblance of a living .

Don't worry, I still love everyone (OK not really EVERYONE but those of you who are know who you are) and appreciate the attention and good wishes.

Now looking at my special watch and secret decoder ring, I think I still have an hour or so available to be wasted looking at today's crossword and possibly sneak in a nap before dinner.

Wish me luck...Y'all...

I Wanna' Be Your "Big Toe"

Chicks Dig Me...Because I Rarely Wear Underwear...And If I do It's Something Provocative


I'm busy this morning working on another paying endeavor, but I took time out to fool around a little and thought that I'd share some YouTube clips I found from one of my favorite movies..."Stripes."

It's funny in and of itself, but if you were ever in the military (as I was for a couple of years in the Navy reserve) or grew up around a military base (which I did outside of Ft. Rucker, Alabama...home of Army Aviation) it's even funnier, even without the participation of Bill Murry and John Candy.

Enjoy the memories if you have a few minutes...this came out way back in 1981...TWENTY NINE years ago (Good GOD I'm getting old...)





Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Fax Me?

Keeping Up With Business Technology...


Today I assume/presume that most people take things like Federal Express and color printer/scanners/Fax machines pretty much for granted.

That is particularly true for people born after the mid 1980's I guess.

I...on the other hand...if I looked around, could have found some carbon paper in a drawer even a recently as ten years ago.

I have an old typewriter still today.

Yet it amazes me the number of web sites on the Internet--places you can only get to by using a Cable Modem or DSL connection or God forbid a dial up connection with America On Line--which still demand that you provide a FAX number when you fill out one of their web based forms.

I just got off of a session with a web page where I was requesting a "sample" of one of their DIN rail mount Electrical Surge Traps (techno mumbo-jumbo...don't ask) and the page demanded I supply a FAX number.

I have two printers in the building which also have "FAX" functions built in, but other than sending stuff to the stupid Federal government and the idiots over in Nashville spending taxpayer money I haven't used a FAX machine for any real business purpose in probably three years.

FAX is obsolete, as far as I'm concerned, when I can simply scan any given document or even print it in PDF format electronically and then attach it to an E-Mail and be done with the process.

For those readers younger than probably 35 or 40, the FAX machine revolutionized business communications and transactions in it's day...about 1985 or so.

In 1985 a fax machine cost over $1,000 and was the size of a small refrigerator.

The FAX machine, along with Federal Express, in my considered Redneck opinion also permanently screwed up business because with overnight mail and instant transmissions...instead of having two or three weeks to work on a proposal and giving your customer a well considered offering with a decent price, purchasing agents started waiting until Wednesday afternoon to send you a request for proposal and expected to have your answer back in their hands by noon the following Friday (basically 1-1/2 day later.)

In the mean time you either had to type your own words using something called WordSTAR, then print out your words on another ancient device called a "dot matrix" printer, and do calculations using a pre Microsoft Excel program called Lotus 123, and...

well...you get my drift.

Still, in the process of lamenting the changes in business over the past 30 years, I still miss some of the quaint ways things worked and the idea of having a "secretary" and her listening to you through your "Dictaphone" instead of having an angry gum chewing lesbian "administrative assistant" who calls in sick every Tuesday after a Monday or Friday holiday.

Don't get me wrong...we had angry lesbians back then(Google Rosie O'Donnell), but you had the right to not have to hire one to sit inside the front door of your office without risking having the AFLCIO and American Civil Liberties Union serving you with court documents.

I'm not quite sure what angry women have to do with FAX machines other than I have little use of either these days, and I have to go now and see if I can fire up a game of Space Invaders or Asteroids or Frogger on my Commadore 64 because I'm too tired to keep writing.

Monday, July 05, 2010

Out Smarting Myself

Haste Makes Waste...


Well, after spending most of last week complaining and worrying about getting an entire PLC control panel in the door in the form of pieces and parts and wire spools, I still managed to end up not getting a darn thing done this extended holiday weekend because of some last minute changes made due to parts/material availability.

Of all things...the "enclosure"...the big metal box which I was going to put everything in ended up being too small because the UPS--Uninterruptable Power Supply--I was using wouldn't fit.

And it wouldn't fit because the unit I would have normally ordered was not available until August, so the company GAVE me the next larger size for the same price on a rush order basis.

I knew that it would be a tight fit physically, but I was willing to give it a try because I already had the panel ordered and on its way but when I opened everything up and laid it all out there was no way to squeeze it all together.

So now I'm stuck waiting on a return authorization and for the larger panel to get here on Wednesday or Thursday.

This kind of crap happens to me every year, all the time around the "holidays." I sit around here doing almost nothing every day all day...then I get busy and it never fails that I come up against a three day weekend or Christmas or something and BAM...I'm late and in a hurry.

Oh well...at least I have paying work, even if it is to be done on a rush basis, and then when I'm finished I can get on with trying to find out a way to be late on the next project.

It's tough being me...but somebody's got to do it...

Sunday, July 04, 2010

Independence Day

Is it the "4th" or the "Forth" of July?


I don't know about you, but I've pretty much excelled at doing virtually nothing so far this holiday weekend, and loved every minute of the wasted time.

Wait, let me check and think for a minute...

Yeap...I'm pretty sure that if you don't count cooking and drinking and breathing, I've been pretty successful (at doing nothing since Friday.) We've had family in town visiting from the Pittsburgh area since Thursday night so I've had to modify my normal nocturnal schedule to keep up with everyone and be a good host and thus the computer work and blogging has been suffering a little as a result I guess.

I just noticed I even avoided finding anything to write about on Saturday and with the exception of this posting I almost missed Sunday also.

Go figure...

In local news...we're up to our eyeballs with tomatoes around here right now. I've planted five different varieties which have all been growing for about nine weeks now and some of the plants are over 6 feet tall and I'm picking somewhere between a half dozen and a dozen tomatoes every day.

I have some "fifty day" middle sized plants which have been producing for a couple of weeks, and this week my Purple Heirloom and giant "Best Boy" plants have started coming in, and I still have another generic plant I bought on sale at the grocery store and three Romano plants I started from seeds this spring which have yet to bear any fruit.

Then today I noticed that my Squash plants are finally setting a few Squash and the little Cucumbers are coming in two or three at a time each day and all in all life's just plain good here in Eastern Tennessee at the Turbo Pup Compound.

Vegetable gardening has always been a hit or miss endeavor for me until this year because I either was just plain lazy or didn't have the time and resources to plant a decent garden.

But this old house has had large garden plots all around it since the early 1960's under the previous owner's auspices, and all I had to do this year was bust up the ground and plant whatever I wanted and then do a little watering and wait a couple of months and here we are.

I felt like that it would have been some sort of crime for us to NOT use the fertile earth to make some stuff to put on a few sandwiches and in some salad bowls when we didn't have anything else to do.

And back to the 4th of July, in spite of all of the crap in the news showing angry stupid people bitching and complaining about everything and anything, I'm dang proud of our Country in whatever shape and form the idiots in Washington DC try to morph it into, and I'm glad I was born in the USA, in Lower Alabama a couple of decades after WWII and have had the opportunity to succeed or fail based on my own ability and efforts rather than waiting around for the "officials" to reach into someone else's pocket and hand me cash.

No matter what the laws say today or will say 20 years from now, I'm as independent as I want to be in my own soul...and my soul is the last thing I'll surrender on Independence day or any other day on the calendar.

I wish a few more people twenty or thirty years yonger than me could understand this simple concept...without listining to the likes of Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson and thinking they have it hard in life.

God Bless America...