Saturday, April 18, 2009

Live From LA

The Cross Country Turbo Pup Rides Again...

Well, we got the first 6 1/2 hours behind us today, arriving mid afternoon in time to get a little work done and grab some Mexican food for dinner.

After lunch tomorrow we'll be moving on south to the coast...

apparently in the rain.

At least for a piece of a day or two.

That's OK though, because last trip we enjoyed near perfect weather for the entire 17 days and the odds were going to catch up with us at some point eventually.

Ya'll have a lovely weekend...what's left of it...

Friday, April 17, 2009

The Turo Pup's Big Adventure

Another Swing Through The Southeast US

Just in case you couldn't tell by the light blog posting the past couple of days...I've been busting Butt here at the Turbo Pup compound on the Banks of the Mighty Tennessee River the past week catching up on personal stuff and cleaning up some professional details in anticipation of making yet another Spring trip.

You see, early Early EARLY Saturday morning we're going back on the road again for another 1,500 mile adventure.

The Turbo Pup's lockers and sea chests are packed and staged by the kitchen door for loading into the car.

And Pat's got a new paint job on her toe nails and finger nails...

and ME?

I'm trying to get my scraggly unshaven visage together along with my laptop computer and ten pounds of files and paper in order to get out the door and packed into the car trunk with some towels and beach chairs in anticipation of fishing on the farm this weekend, moving on late Sunday to attend some meetings on the Florida coast on Monday

Then we're slowly moving to the East on across the state of Florida to Cedar Key for a few nights, then lunch with Uncle Darrell in Lake Butler, finally crash landing back on our Little Island on the Georgia Coast on Wednesday to continue recharging our batteries and say hello to old friends and eat a little sea food.

We can hardly stand the wait, but by spitting the car drive up into managable daily segments with known destinations rewarding our patience I find the milestones to be well worth the efforts.

I'll try to talk to y'all from the road as Internet connections will will someone pass me another dozen Oysters and some cocktail sauce...

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Tax Day

"Free" At Last?

I'm pleased to report that as April 15th slips by on the calendar, I didn't spend five minutes fooling with income taxes and income tax forms today...

Or Yesterday.

This would be because I've already spent near a hundred dollars on Turbotax software and spent more than a week of my time in January/February meeting my family's Federal and State income tax documentation "requirements."

It drives me crazy that so many people out there in the general population are eligible for a "refund" (read that "earned income credit") and they wait until the last minute to file, end up paying H&R Crock Block $55.95 to file a simple two page tax return, then pay another $30 as interest and fees to procure their "refund anticipation check."

If you're going to take money from me in the form of "earned income credits"...could you at least do it EFFICIENTLY?

I'm one of the first ones to support "trickle down economics," but spending 25% to 30% of your share of my and my fellow "upper income" redistributed taxpayer dollars just to get the ink on the forms and the check in your bank account is ridiculous.

The interesting thing is that, while by law we didn't have to file income tax forms in Tennessee--because Tennessee has no personal state income tax--we managed to fool around and let Pat's company withhold Georgia income tax from her employment severance agreement for the entire year and now the state of Georgia is balking at paying her "refund"/"return" back to her on a timely basis.

Thousands of "tax dollars" stranded in the state coffers, money that should be sitting in our bank accounts instead of theirs...and we've already been through two cycles of written correspondence and a couple of phone calls where the state's position is that it's our fault we can't justfy the "tax return" and they're not getting our paperwork and even if they have..."it will take 4 to 8 weeks for them to process our information" and get back to us.

Government Idiots...

As is typical of the government, they ignore mail and Fax messages and it's virtually impossible to get anyone of authority on the telephone so apparently we're going to be in Government bearucratic hell for the summer trying to prove to the State of Georgia and their inane employees that WE DON'T LIVE THERE ANYMORE.

Even before the dust settled, Georgia made me spend the time and energy to belatedly file a Tennessee Income Tax Form on Pat's behalf showing she owes no income tax in 2008, and that isn't good enough thus far so they insist on still holding OUR money.

As far as I can tell, slavery hasn't ended with Abe Lincoln's administration and the so called "Civil War" of the 1860's

I say that slavery is alive and well today, it's just that the chains and bonds which bind us to our masters are FINANCIAL rather than steel and leather.

I sure hope that you are happy with YOUR government, because if it was MY government things would be quite different on a daily basis.

I've got to go to my tea party now...

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Sweating With The Socialists


I'm busy this morning in the mean time, instead of being pissed off at something I SAID or WROTE here, here's something I pointed out already on the Internet...


That Will Be All...For now

Monday, April 13, 2009

The Silence Of The Lambs

Excellence In Mediocrity and Complacency

Amazingly enough the US Navy was allowed to fire three gunshots yesterday--Easter Sunday afternoon--on a day we were supposed to be celebrating a religious holiday instead of smelling gunpowder.

When the smoke cleared, I was happy to learn that there were three dead "pirates." and one other kid with a slightly higher IQ or a little less gumption/guts/resolution in US custody.

It annoyed me that FOX News spazmo reporter Hernando Revolver Geraldo "At Large" Rivera insists on calling the detainee and the deceased of all things "Buccaneers." I didn't take the time to change channels but CNN and MSNBC are probably calling them "Freedom Fighters" or Somali Rebels."

When the US Navy got through with them "Corpses" and "Life Prisoner" fits better I think.

Regardless of the linguistics details, in the process the brave Captain of a ship with the schizophrenic sounding name "Maersik Alabama," Richard Phillips, was a free man.

Wait a minute...


"Buccaneers" are something you see at Halloween parties or in a Disney movie.

These guys are/were different, and instead of fantasy land this is REAL LIFE.

I'd call them THIEVES.

Or perhaps ROBBERS.

Or in today's world, let's call them what they are...


That deduction and definition is pretty easy for me to formulate in my mind because most if not all of the dead men and their peers, in spite of living in Africa, are actually Muslims, and their actions terrorize people who have been conditioned to believe that it's against the law to take measures to defend their own personal safety and their personal property.

Muslims found terrorizing other people = Muslim Terrorists.

Isn't that simple?

And the other people in the above equation are generally law abiding citizens of the US or other non-muslim countries which today through our modern enlightened education system have been convinced that guns are E V I L.

Then there are those which, like many of the Europeans, have been outright disarmed by force by their government through the criminalization of the private ownership of weapons.

Today even here in the US common thinking is that you're supposed to call 911 and wait on the GOVERNMENT to respond...and in the event that things get crazy and you actually fear for your life and you do take action, you risk being second guessed in criminal proceedings thereby facing jail time and/or you risk being sued in civil court because you shot the penis and kneecap off some asshole trying to take your wallet in a Pizza Hut.

Excuse me if I appear insensitive, but my opinions might just be strongly influenced by first hand knowledge gained when I personally had a 32' foot boat I owned stolen, after a couple decades earlier having a "downtrodden victim of socioeconomic disparity" pump a shotgun in the small of my back while another "disadvantaged minority" beat me in the head and broke the barrel off his revolver on the back of my head.

In neither event did the "authorities" do anything to prevent the "crimes" nor did they provide any relief after the fact or catch the "suspects"... so I say all of the Kumbaya singing sniveling tree hugging booger eating why-can't-we-all -just get-along progressives liberals should just shut up crying and demanding non-lethal measures and UN Resolutions solving misbehavior's atrocities committed by the same kind of animals which have tortured others throughout history.

...until you've been there.

Until you've had a loaded gun pointed at you by a stranger, I think you're full of crap pontificating on the acceptable measures which are legal or societally acceptable for use in defending your life and property.

Let me put this memo out there for future reference so you won't be surprised when you turn on the TV and see me describing the demise of "the assailant" the next time I have a gun pointed at me and the person isn't wearing a uniform/badge....

I grew up shooting a gun, and today I'll shoot a three hole grouping through your "center of mass"-your face and/or your chest--before you can say "just kidding" if you put me in the position where it's me and my family and my property against your misplaced, misguided, alcohol and drug induced mal-intentions.

I'll use the same level of force if you're stone cold sober or certifiably insane and you start acting up on my front porch--so don't plan on using the "under the influence" defense because I simply don't care and don't have time to negotiate with you once you point the business end of your gun at me.

And skin color be damned...I'll verify the threat, offer a verbal warning, obtain a clear sight picture, and pull the trigger.

Unfortunately this is something which many people apparently have a hard time understanding, but I see it like this.

Passing a new gun law or trying and convicting the person which took my life does ME no good once I'm DEAD.


Dead because I was shot.

Or dead...beat to death kind of dead or run over with a pickup truck variety of Dead.

And since they're not going to pass laws making fists and boots and frying pans and baseball bats and pickup trucks illegal, I feel I have to choose my method of defense and perfect it.

My idea of gun control is "hitting the intended target--every time."

Even if they did produce a new list of things it's illegal to hit me in the head with or drive across my torso...just like hand guns in England or Washington DC...I'm pretty certain that they'll have a hard time with the confiscation of these newly declared illegal "weapons."

And the criminals and thugs that don't obey the current gun laws we already have on the books won't give up their Ford F-250's because they need them to go hunting and to get to the liquor store.

So I figure sitting around worrying about the latest laws or lobbying for the passage of new ordinances is time better spent by the lawyers and politicians--people that make their living making the law useless and un-understandable.

(I'm taking a big breath here boss...and changing the subject completely...)

So any way...if things work out on the Professional Injuneering front I'm heading back to South Alabama this weekend before conducting some more business on the Florida and Georgia Coasts next week.

In my computer bag I'll have along with me my new plans and drawings for the construction of my own personal solution to the Somali "piracy" issues:

I call her the "Mozark Alabama", and she's powered by an old Chinook helicopter turbine burning ethanol we distill on board from corn squeezin's. She'll only sleep six but everybody has a king sized bed and a private crapper and I'll handle kitchen duty three days a week.

And here's her smaller sister ships...the SS Mozark Enterprise guided missile cruiser:

and the more modern Mozark Elba PT Submarine attack boat:

Using current world standards and relying on the UN, I hope to augment law enforcement efforts on the high seas and suspect there won't be any ship hijackings off Panama City, Mexico Beach, Lake Eufala, or St. Simons Island anytime soon.

Sorry, but the rest of you out there in San Francisco, Boston and off northern Long Island are on your own...