Saturday, February 20, 2010

Cooking More Chili

The Final Practice Round...


This time exactly two weeks from now I'll be standing in a booth, surrounded by 1,500 hungry people on St. Simons Island, Georgia, stirring a giant 72 quart stainless steel pot full of my soon to be famous "Jamaican Me Cajun Green Butt Chili" with a boat paddle.

Judging starts at 11:00 AM on March 6th, and I can hardly wait...

In a final research and development effort in preparation for the event, this weekend I'm cooking my fourth and final test batch of the new Boston Butt pork based recipe...about three quarters of a gallon of the stuff this time...measuring the EXACT quantities in weight and/or volume of each of the ingredients in the mixture.

I'm close...real close to having the recipe and final process down, then after this effort I just multiply everything by twenty to scale up to about 15 gallons and then everything should be academic on the day of the Rotary Red Hot Chili Festival.

We're real excited to get back to our little island for the first time this year, and since it's been about four or five months since our last visit, five days is just barely enough time to absorb enough of the food and weather and visit with all of our friends that still live down there in paradise.

Looking at the weather websites this morning, its 22 degrees warmer--currently 60 degrees F--there on the shores of the Atlantic Ocean than it is here on the banks of the Mighty Tennessee River.

I hope the weather holds up...it was in the mid Seventies last year...because cold or rain can severely affect the attendance and make it a miserable process cooking outside under a tent, and defeating the purpose of raising money for charity by selling "tasting bracelets" to the attendees.

Pat and the Turbo Pup and I will have a good time regardless of the weather, because we'll be back home for a little while and able to stick our feet in the sand on the beach there once again.

Everybody please pray for good weather...if you will...

Friday, February 19, 2010

They Actually Have "Sex Rehab"?

Sound's Like To Me Tiger Needs A "Sex Re-Tread"

Stupid Crap All the People That Are Stupid As Crap Should Know

Today's Public Service Announcement...


I swear to God, Ladies and Gentlemen, some days I reach the point when I think that my head (the ever greying, ever balding one I talk about all of the time here on this blog) is GOING TO EXPLODE.

Explosively...at the risk of being redundant.

Why?

Because all of this BS "Green Energy This" and "Green Energy That" and other mindless PorkulusStimlus driven drivel bantered around by the lamestream media and the dirty stinking liberal progressive Patchouli stinking, Kumbaya singing, tree hugging environmentalists is making me crazy.

I've said it before here several times (at least once every three months), but this afternoon I feel like giving you a "Cliff Notes" rendition of my basic insights into why the whole Green Energy and Conservation and Recycling initiatives, as presently proposed by Government, are doomed to failure.

Point Number 1.

You want Green Energy...something like wind power?

You get all warm and fuzzy thinking about all of the CO2 and NOx emissions you're going to avoid adding to the Global Warming Monster that coming to visit you in your living room next year???

Then go here and look at Siemens Energy's website, they're the largest producer of utility scale wind turbines in the world, and they're in Germany.

Then give them a call or send them an E-mail asking for a budget quotation on one of their wind turbines.

I did exactly that last spring, called them and e-mailed them while working on a proposal for a wind farm in an industrial park down in the Florida Panhandle...

Know what my honest technical request got me?

A polite e-mail saying that due to present market conditions, they couldn't even give me a BUDGET price for six months to one year because they had sold everything they could build for the next TWO YEARS.

So in spite of all of the rhetoric, if you start right now as far as I can tell no one's going to generate one single Kilowatt or KWH of electricity in the southeastern US in the foreseeable future unless they placed a purchase order and got in the production flow a few years before Obama was elected President.

Further, there's a wind farm up here in Tennessee a few dozen miles north of the Turbo Pup compound that was erected a few years ago over the protests of guess who???

THE ENVIRONMENTALISTS, who were worried that the blades of the wind turbines were killing Bats and Migratory birds flying over the mountain tops on which the turbines were located.

Funny thing, but if you want to generate energy from wind, you have to put your generators where the wind blows--preferably all day every day and at a rate of something like 15 to 20 MPH.

But the Federal by God Government of the United States of 'Merica, in their infinite wisdom, has let the EPA and the Department of the Interior add further red tape to the "Green Energy" permitting process.

If some tye died patchouli stinking tree hugging Jane Fonda loving hippy (or group or groups thereof) wants to object on behalf of the Geese and Ducks and Sea Gulls and Bats, you and your group of investors in the "Green Energy" wind energy project have to do an "Migratory Wildlife Impact Study", often lasting 18 months to 2 years, prior to obtaining a permit to generate your non-stinky, no CO2 and NOx emitting electrical power.

And get this...this is the kicker for all of the local Tree Hugging Environmentally Conscious Green Weenies...after we've waited two years for the government permit and two more years for our wind turbine to arrive in a BMW or Mercedes truck or boat from Germany, our local utility offers to sell us a portion of their "Green Energy for a FEE"...something like a 25% increase in electrical cost (don't hold me to the number because I'm too lazy to look it up right now.)

Got it?

So if you want Green Energy boys and girls, you better get your Checkbook and Wallet out because it's not going to be CHEAP, and then the next thing you know all of the liberals are going to start crying and yapping about the "working families" and "poor people" not being able to afford it, and then once the Government has converted everything over to expensive GREEN ENERGY, those of us they deem can afford it are going to not only see an increase in our own electric bill, but they're going to start making us also pay for the extra cost of the aforementioned "working families" and "poor folks" energy bills.

Ain't that a lovely pile of Dog Squeeze?


Point Number 2.

"Recycling"

That word makes my head spin at a rate approaching orbital rotational velocity.

I've gotten to the point where I just shut up rather than tell what I know about the current process of "municipal government" managed recycling because my friends and acquantences--often well intended people/citizens (i.e. not tree hugging tye died Patchouli stinking Kumbaya singing liberals) would get mad at me when I started talking about it.

Let me break this to you gently.

I suspect (without direct Internet citations because I'm lazy...but I know I'm pretty close) that at least 50% of the crap people take the time to separate and place in their lovely blue and green "recycling bins" on the curb once a week, is actually taken to the local "waste transfer station" or directly to the garbage dump/landfill and promptly mixed right back in with the tampons and empty tuna cans and left over dinner scraps that didn't get flushed down the toilet or garbage disposal.

It's just that simple.

You see, depending on economic conditions, there is very little if any post consumer market for ANYTHING we're encouraged to recycle...be it plastic or glass or aluminum or cardboard.

It's just not there because the economics of cleaning up and separating things and "recycling" them back into the production stream exceeds starting from scratch with clean feed stock.

One lithium battery or one phonebook in a dumpster full of newspapers screws everything up when the load enters the material stream at the manufacturer.

And as long as the local town or city or Waste Management will come to your house and haul pretty much every thing you can possibly want to throw away each month for $39.95--nuclear waste and fluorescent light bulbs included--enough of the population is going to continue to poison the "environment" at a rate which greatly exceeds anything that you conscienious do-gooders can accomplish...

And guess what?

Within limits...Mother Earth can handle it.

After all, we're not INVENTING mercury and Lithium and Lead and all of this stuff everyone is waisting time hyperventalating about and trying to pass legislation to prevent. This crap was already in the air or the dirt, just spread around everywhere...

heck...on a simplistic basis I'd like to see all the toxic crap concentrated and localized, then me and a bunch of other injuneers/investors could cover it all up with dirt and build a Nursing Home or Playground on top of it.

OK...maybe not...but still...

Any way, my point about all the hysteria regarding the need for recycling is this.

You want to force your desire for a cleaner planet on everyone?

That's EASY.

Make residential and small business garbage collection cost $1000 per month for anything over 20 pounds...maybe 50 pounds for an office.

FIFTY DOLLARS A POUND...that will do it, and toss in a prison term and a big fine for poopy baby diapers and batteries...force all the "working moms" back into linen diapers and using a diaper service or actually doing laundry...that's the ticket.

You know people will change their tune and most will be screaming bloody murder just like they do if and when gasoline finally hits $5.00 a gallon here in the US...which is another story beyond the scope of my diatribe this afternoon.

Otherwise, and until then, people are going to continue to leave their lights on while they're out of the room for five minutes, drive giant SUV's and toss old recliners and a year's worth of newspapers in the garbage along with used motor oil and Plutonium from their son's Ayatollah Komeinin Peaceful Nuclear Reactor Prototype Science Kit.

Got it now?

You know I'm right when you think about it.

So stop mindlessly saying "they're aught to be a law" and feeling good about yourself and your "environmental consciousness" and go out and throw away something that will make the liberals head spin...a nice used transmission or something full of Dioxin or PCB's.

And by the way...you're welcome...

Dinner For One?

Feeding Your Dog...





Thanks Rodg

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Let The Anti Aviation Hysteria Begin

A Chevy Passenger Van Can Do More Damage...


So I'm sitting here watching the news coverage of the "Potential Intentional/Unintentional Flight into Terrain" incident out in Austin, Texas and as is usual when a plane crashes everyone's already freaking out.

FOX News is doing a pretty good job of reminding everyone that a car or truck could do similar or greater damage.

They just reported that there are seventeen thousand airfields in the US, and only 450 have control towers, which makes moot the point that the guy probably didn't file a flight plan and without a control tower no one might have seen him take off.

Speaking from personal experience, operating out of a "controlled airspace" field is a pain in the butt...I learned how to fly at McCullem Field (RYY) in Kennesaw, Georgia in the early 1990's. It was an uncontrolled field using a "unicom" system where the pilots talked to each other in the take off and landing pattern.

You could park your car, go inside and rent an airplane, pick up the keys, do your preflight, top off the fuel tanks, and be in the air in less than an hour.

And no one knew where you were going unless you filed a flight plan, and that's something done in your own best interest just in case something goes wrong.

Any way, sit back with me and watch all of the wild eyed speculation and calls for "regulating all of those rich guys" who have pilots' licenses.

Know this...there are literally millions of hours spent in the air each year by competent, well trained and well intended pilots in the general aviation community.

Very few incidents like this ever occur, and even if this is an intentional act I say that the number of people killed and maimed and injured by idiots in the general non-aviation public holding DRIVERS LICENSES...something like 40,000 deaths each year...should as a minimum cause us to stop more people from driving, or at least make it harder to get a license, rather than using events like this to screw with all of the law abiding men and women out there who own and operate small airplanes.

Dammit...

Here's Where You're Going To Be When You Put GOVERNMENT In Charge Of Healthcare

I Want Nothing To Do With The Process...


Hazelwood man dies after 10 calls to 911 over two days
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
By Sadie Gurman, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette


In his first call to 911, Curtis Mitchell sounded calm, explaining to dispatchers that his "entire stomach [was] in pain."

By the time his longtime girlfriend made a 10th call nearly 30 hours later, she was frantic. He wasn't breathing. He was cold to the touch.

"Oh God, oh God," Sharon Edge sobbed to dispatchers. "I've been trying to get an ambulance over here for three days.

Paramedics arrived at their Hazelwood home as Ms. Edge tried to resuscitate the 50-year-old, but it was too late."

Read more here if you can stand it...

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Biden's Blackness

Fair Weather Ash Wednesday Catholics?


So apparently I wasn't paying attention, but just today I learned that it turns out that VP Joe Biden is of the Catholic religious persuasion (my dad's family being pedestrian Presbyterian and my Mom being a Baptist converted to Methodist...a Religion which I continue to ignore practice today...)

But we're talking business and governance, not heaven and hell and the pursuit thereof, so I have to point out...

being a professional scumbag rat bastard Democratic lieing thieving politician, anyone paying any attention at all knows that Biden publicly chooses to stay off of the "third rail" issue [Abortion] by supporting or otherwise not not supporting Abortion legislation reform depending on the direction the wind is blowing and which way the campaign financing budget coffers are buldging from.

Just now I was flipping around the TV channels and came across this image on FOX News:



See that dark spot on Biden's dopey face?

At first I thought he and Obamarama had been playing basketball and the Prez and thrown an elbow to Biden's mushy forehead.

After a little Googling I learned that Biden was proudly sporting his Ash smudge he received while attending an Ash Wednesday mass.

Of course, in broadcasting the same latest mindless daily never ending Presidential news conference, CNN. being a little more squeamish about overt displays of religion and religious symbols, had a narrower camera angle leaving Biden's silly ash smudged face out of the picture for most of the news conference.



In my considered Redneck opinion, Biden and Pelosi and most if not all of the entire Kennedy family are an embarrassment to the tenets of the Catholic faith, and America is worse off as a result of their overbearing, hypocritical participation in the political process.

Anyone care to take a shot at proving me wrong?

Job Description?

They Forgot Being An Expert At Farting and Belching (In Key)...


"While performing the duties of this job, the employee may be required to stand, walk, read, hear, talk, balance, climb, use hands, use fingers, reach, stoop, kneel, crouch, crawl, smell, push or pull. The employee may be required to move or lift objects weighing up to 100 pounds. Specific vision abilities required for this position include close vision, distance vision, peripheral vision, color vision and the ability to adjust focus."

Our Microwave Died

If It Isn't One Thing, It's Another...


The way I see things, the advantage of living in a near 50 year old house is that "they don't make 'em like that anymore."

...solid brick exterior construction. Real wood grown over thirty to fifty years rather than that soft "white wood" stuff they sell in the big box home improvement stores...

But (but not Butt)...

The disadvantage of having a house near a half century old is that everything in it is almost as old as I am, and even the parts that have been added or replaced have ten or fifteen years on them and thus...

this morning when Pat endeavored to heat her water for her morning cup of fancy White Tea all she got was buzzing sounds and a curl of acrid smoke in response to pressing the "start" button...

And now I'm faced with the task of unbolting a 50 pound chunk of sheet metal and plastic and electrical wires from the walls and cabinet (with no instruction manual) and replacing it with a new device.

I really want a convection microwave combination, and with the vent hood option that more than doubles the basic cost of the appliance, so with present finances and priorities I guess that our home will enjoy a reduction in the total output of electromagnetic radiation for a month or so until I can get off my butt and bring another device into the building.

My guess is that the water heater and the 25 year old Heat Pump System (it cools but struggles to heat) are not far behind on the list of age induced infrastructure casualties, and all I ask is that I be able to plan things and research the alternatives so we're not just running out and buying a given piece of machinery in a panic.

That said, I guess that it's time to go now and Google myself to death looking at technical specs and pricing for the replacement unit.

An injuneer's work is never done...and unfortunately for me, even if it is done, I'll generally find something inconsequential to obsess over just for fun...you know?

Wednesday Morning Music

Crank Up Your Speaker Volume And Enjoy This Hybrid Tune...





(yeah...that's a Journey and Metallica Musical Mix-up)

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

It Snowed All Day For Two Days...But I'm Still Grumpy

Not Enough On The Ground To Ride My Sled


One of the little details I know about from taking three quarters of Thermodynamics in college applies to winter weather and real life.

That would be that when the air temperature is below freezing but the air is DRY AS THE SAHARA DESERT, any snow that comes down out of the sky ends up producing snowflakes that don't hang around, but they also don't melt.

They go through a process on the Psychometric chart (something all of us injuneers carry around in our wallet) called "Sublimation", where the water skips over the "liquid phase" and goes straight from the "solid phase" to the "gaseous phase" right before your eyes.

That said, we've had a bunch of that (sublimation) going on around here the past ten days or two weeks else we'd really be up to our knees in snow drifts here at the Turbo Pup Compound on the banks of the Mighty Tennessee River.

Meanwhile, looking at the internet, back on our little Island down on the Georgia Coast it is what...let me check..."sunny and 51 degrees F."

Who's idea was this any way?

Why I Hate The Olympics...In 250 350 Words

Innocence Lost


I guess that, like most of the other members of the "Baby Boomer" generation out there that came of age with at least one television--if you were lucky a Color TV--in their household, I "used to"--past tense--enjoy watching the Summer and Winter Olympic events every few years when the TV schedule announced their availability.

Who can forget the drama of the competition of people like Nadia Komenich, Peggy Flemming, Mark Spitz, and the endless list of other competitors who skated and vaulted and swam their way across our TV screens in the days of our youth when steroids and "doping" scandals were either non-existent or not covered on the front pages of the NY Times.

And of course there is the (in)famous images of the guy tumbling off the snow ski jump ramp on ABC's "Wide World of Sports" intro back in the early 1970's:



That definitely made me think twice when I had the urge to go out and strap two 1x4's to my boots and take off sliding down the nearest hill when it snowed in south Alabama once every twenty years.

My problem today with the "Modern Olympics" and the associated TV coverage is the loss of the character and the insidious intrusion of the "professional" athlete into an event which, in theory if not spirit, was originally touted as showcasing the abilities of the common men and women of countries--for the shear pleasure of competition and as an extension of national pride.

Today, since most everyone has no morals and will do anything for profit or for glory & recognition, moments like the 1980 USA victory over the Russians in Hockey or any one of a number of other conquests by international AMATEUR ATHLETES has been poisoned and overshadowed by the likes of Michael Jordan and the other "professional" assholes that have in recent years just been allowed to show up at the Olympics for the photo opportunity.

All that said, I hope that you will this morning excuse me, because other than knowing that some poor fellow from Georgia...the Asian Georgia...died on the track sliding down an ice covered hill at 90 MPH, I pretty much could care less what's going on in Vancouver and it's suburbs in Canada.

Dang I'm an ignorant, uncultured Asshole, aren't I?

Monday, February 15, 2010

They Sell Everything I Ever Needed Or Could Need In The Future...

Where's My Credit and Debit Card?


So today, being manic depressive/Alzheimer's infected/attention deficit disordered, I'm busy designing an extension to our Turbo Pup rear yard access deck which I built last summer, to include a covered outdoor kitchen area/storage shed/greenhouse, while at the same time trying to coordinate with it another future expansion of the Master Bedroom and tiny little associated half bath into a full bath with a walk in closet with additional floor space in/around the main bedroom area.

Everybody got those specifications written down (there's a test later)?

In either Phase Two or Phase Three of the renovation process I expect to end up with a second bathroom with a bath tub and a toilet and a sink that's larger that the ones that they sell to midgets and bikini models at Home Depot.

After all, it's my toilet...and unlike an airline seat I'm renting from Air Tran or Delta Airlines, I want one built by Lazy-Boy from their "Double Wide" "executive" series...something with a heated "Naugahyde" seat with high speed Internet, high definition 1080P, and the new Wii I-Max surround sound video game console option.

They might just find me dead like Elvis on my toilet if I buy what I want...but I digress...

I was looking around for pricing and dimensions on some larger than "child sized" toilets and Jacuzzi Tubs and found this web site...Safer Wholesale.com and their product selection blew my mind as I surfed my way through their listings...

Where else in the entire world can you find, on one Web Site, such a bunch of excellent stuff like this for sale?

Elliptical Machines
Snow Blowers
E Book Readers
Cigarette Rollers
Popcorn Makers
Pool Tables
Bowling Balls
Train Horns
Trailers
Video Glasses
Kitchen Fun
Air Conditioners
Corn Stove Heaters
GPS
Electric Infrared Heaters
WindMills
Electric Saver
RC Cars
Fuel Saver Kits
UTV/Utility Vehicles
Cornhole/Bean Bag Game
Dirt Bikes
Electric Scooters
Kids Fitness Equipment
Kids Powerwheels
Exercise Equipment
Gaming Equipment
Generators
Go Karts
Golf Carts
Hot Tubs & Spas
Mobility Scooters
Mopeds / Gas Scooters
Trike - 3 Wheeled Scooters
Pocket Bikes
Saunas
Snowmobiles
Super Bikes
Tanning Beds
ATVs
Helmets (DOT)
Massage Chairs
Extreme Blowouts
Swimming Pools

Cigarette Rollers? Train Horns? Bowling Balls? Video Glasses? Kitchen fun (wink wink)?

Cornhole/ Beanbag Game?

ah ah ah ah ah ah ahh hheeeeeehhhhhaAAAAA

POCKET BIKES?

What the heck is a "Pocket Bike"?

I just decided to buy a DOT helmet and a Massage Chair and forget exactly why I brought all of this stuff up in the first place.

Seriously...there's a country song in there somewhere...

Somebody needs to call David Allen Coe.

Lazy Blogging

I'll Admit I'm Useless Just In Case You Didn't Notice...





Thanks Rodg