Bush's Colonoscopy

Exclusive Photos...


I was just sitting here reading about President Bush handing over the keys to Airforce One today while they do a little video work on his rear end, and it occurred to me to wonder what the test might find and how the NY Times would report the outcome.

First of all, here's a few photos of a normal colon:





And here's a look at the insides of our chief executive:





It's no wonder his ass has been bothering him.

(Yes, I came up with the idea all by my wittle self, and the photoshop work only took a half hour...)

I'm Surrounded!!!

Nobody Move...


I was sitting here minding my own business, waiting on a friend to come in from the airport, when I looked up and found this scene surrounding me in my living room as I check the weather and write this evening (as usual, click to enlarge.):



All I have to do is bark and I cause pandemonium...

100 Degrees Fahrenheit

And I'll Be There...


Well, I'm getting ready to pack up a few gallons of Gatorade and swim over to Brunswick to do some more construction work this morning.

I say "swim" because the air is so thick you can cut it with a knife, and the Weather Wench on the Weather Channel just told me that the forecast high will be somewhere near the combustion temperature of human flesh near 100 degrees F today over on the mainland.

Things weren't much cooler here on our little island yesterday, as our teen aged guests and their mother (the woman that told me that they routinely had no trouble staying out all afternoon on the beach normally) were begging me to abandon our spot out on East Beach yesterday afternoon by about 12:45 PM.

What?

We only arrived at the beach at a little after 11 AM and all the veteran beach bums (including Pat) except me wanted to go home?

So we did.

As is usual, my Missy, the "Turbo Pup", made the most of the day and had the best time--sitting on all of the chairs and spreading sand on all of the beach towels.

Here's a couple of pics showing her progress getting wet and dirty (click to enlarge):









The good news is that the Norton/Symantic guy got back with me and set up a conference call for Monday morning, and he also GAVE me a free download of the new Norton AntiBot software which I managed to get installed and thus far seems to exorcised my computer's demons.

Of course I could come home this afternoon and have floating beds and rotating heads and pea soup vomit all over the living room around the computer...

I just don't know what to expect any more around here.

The Atlanta Falcons

Crappy Then...Still Crappy Now...


Being from lower Alabama, I grew up watching mainly college football and the local high school football team because the nearest NFL franchises were in New Orleans, Tampa Bay, and Atlanta.

Alabama, Mississippi, Tennessee, North & South Carolina, Kentucky, and most of the rest of the Midwest and the Mississippi River flood plain had to watch pro football on television if they actually wanted to SEE a pro football game, unlike people living in Pittsburgh, Green Bay, and NYC.

Even today my great birth state of Alabama still has but three football teams of note--THE University of Alabama "Crimson Tide", the Auburn "Tigers", and most recently the NCAA Division IA Troy State University "Trojans."

I think that you'd agree with me when I say that Alabamians love their college football, although things have never been quite the same since Bear Bryant died back in the 1980's.

Georgia, of course, still has their own mediocre Atlanta Falcons team.

When I moved to Atlanta in 1977 to attend Georgia Tech, the Falcons stadium was but a few miles south of my dorm room, but try as I might I just couldn't manage to become a serious Falcons fan.

You see, the Atlanta Falcons totally SUCKED because the Smith family heir, "baby bubba Smith," had owned the team since the franchise was first awarded and the City of Atlanta stole the money from the taxpayers to build a stadium, and all Mr. Smith cared about was chasing strange women and keeping the status "quo."

Quarterback Steve Bartkowski and running back/receivers William Andrews and Alfred Jenkins had their moments, but after sitting in the stadium in a 20 degree Arctic cold blast watching their 1980 NFC Division playoff loss to the Dallas Cowboys in January 1981, I think that I've attended maybe three Falcons games and watched about the same number on television.

When "baby bubba Smith's" antics finally embarrassed his family name enough and Arthur Blank threw out enough money to cause him to sell the Falcon franchise in 2002, all of my delirious wild eyed friends lambasted me with commentary about how the Falcons were going to become a dynasty like the Atlanta Braves were in Baseball.

All I could do is yawn.

When Mr. Blank tossed Virginia Tech QB Michael Vick a ten year $130 million deal, the City of Atlanta and the Atlanta media started gassing up their cars and buying Super Bowl tickets.

All I could do was smirk.

Today, following Mr. Vick's indictment on Dog Fighting charges, I offer a hearty:

I TOLD YOU ALL SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've said from the start that Michael Vick was nothing but a highly overpaid THUG--sort of a version of NBA Player lite. He had enough savvy to mostly keep his mouth shut, but when it came time to perform on the field he was all smoke and mirrors, and today's Atlanta Falcon's, like the Falcons of the 1970's, still can't put together a Super Bowl Team with just a pretty good quarterback surrounded by a bunch of "has beens" and "wanna be's."

I don't just question Vick's judgment here, I question the entire culture that permeates college and professional sports.

Thugs and Gangsters...

Gangsters and Gold chain adorned Thugs.

(And one huge dumbass that's made $13 million dollars a year for the past five years and spends his time betting on dogs killing each other.)

Aviation Politics

More Bitching About Trying To Fly...


I know that I've mentioned many times before that I was once a bit of a half-assed airplane pilot.

In loosely describing myself as a pilot, I mean that I knew enough to manage to untie the airplane from the tarmac, start the engine, and flop around in the air for an hour or so burning a few gallons of 100 octane low lead gasoline.

Unfortunately, I never managed to actually GO ANYWHERE with my aviation efforts because of FAA intervention. My wife at the time was quite happy with the cost savings realized by my administrative grounding, but I was rather pissed off with the turn of events at the time.

I had the displeasure of learning that the Federal Aviation Administration--a 1950's creation of President Eisenhower--being a government entity, basically has nothing to do all day but waste money and issue mandates.

In my case, it was the "issuing of mandates" that ended my flying career.

You see, the FAA apparently hates the AMA (American Medical Association) and the FDA (the Food and Drug Administration), because if you so much as take an Aspirin or buy a tube of Preparation H and they hear about it, they will unilaterally ground your aching head and ass and on the ground you will sit for the rest of your life (unless you let Delta or United pilots do your flying for you.)

In my case, it was the anticoagulant drug Coumadine that was the source of my flying demise. That, and the crappy blood circulation problems that I've periodically experienced in my legs and abdomen.

So any way, last evening the Brazilians suffered a major airline crash at what is called Brazil's "busiest airport."

SAO PAULO, Brazil (CNN) -- A jetliner crashed and exploded into flames at Brazil's busiest airport on Tuesday night, killing at least 200 people, local rescue workers said.

As investigators prepared to open a probe into the cause of the crash of the TAM Airlines Airbus A320, questions were being raised about both the growth in Brazilian air traffic and Sao Paulo's Congonhas Airport.

The Sao Paulo fire department said at least 200 people, including some on the ground, were dead at the scene. The figure would make Tuesday's crash Brazil's deadliest air disaster.
Brazil President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva declared three days of national morning for the victims.

Witnesses said the plane skidded across a major road at rush hour. Reports that the plane struck a gas station could not be confirmed, but a massive fire broke out.

The crash happened in a driving rain, and the plane apparently struck a building bearing the airline's logo at the small domestic airport in the heart of the city. At least 50 rescue vehicles were at the scene, firefighters said. The fire continued to burn into the night.

I did a little checking and was astonished at what I found out in the process.

THESE CRAZY BRAZILIANS ARE ROUTINELY LANDING BIG AIRPLANES ON A RUNWAY THAT'S ONLY 6,362 FEET LONG!!!

For those of you that graduated from the University of Georgia, that's only a little over three football fields longer than a mile--or about 22 football fields worth of asphalt and concrete.

Most airfields serving commercial jetliners have runways that are at LEAST 10,000 feet long, and may have twelve or fourteen thousand feet of pavement, depending on the service requirements of their customers.

Further, the Sao Paulo Congonhas airport is 2,631 feet above sea level, another performance problem when it comes to pushing a metal wing through the altitude thinned air.

What amazes me is that Sao Paulo also has Gaurulhos International Airport sitting just a few miles to the northeast that has nearly double the runway--12,140 feet--and yet the other airport is the busiest.

Using Chicago as a reference, if it were me, and I were flying around in a shiny aluminum tube with wings in Brazil, I'd make a conscious choice to go into Sao Paulo's "O'Hare" rather than enjoying the convenience of their "Midway" airport if I was interested in landing in foul weather and managing to make it back home in one piece.

I guarantee you that there is some kind of government bullshit political situation behind allowing the airport with the smaller runway to handle most of commercial air traffic.

I'd be looking up the pants leg of the President and the Mayor and the so-called "aviation officials" because someone other than the pilot is responsible for setting this situation up in the first place.

I'm A Terrible Employee

And An Even Worse Employer...


I hate to admit that I took an unscheduled "mental health holiday" from my job site yesterday. I was taking an early morning nap as 7, 8, 9, and 10 AM came and went and only by 11 AM did I manage to drag my rear end out of the bed and into the living room in front of the computer screen.

I feel a bit guilty for letting two days slip by without getting anything done, but when the heat index hit 110 degrees F I understood that my indiscretion was probably justified.

I'll make it up by getting a really early start this morning before eight and possibly tossing in an extra hour or so on the end of the schedule.

If I can finish the woodwork on the soffits and fascias today I'll be happy with the week's progress, because we have family coming into town and Pat has the rest of the week off and I want to be able to enjoy cooking dinner for eight family and friends tomorrow night.

I think that my soon to be famous Chicken Piccata will be on the menu, and possibly some Key Lime Pie for desert. This will be our last opportunity to entertain here in our Sea Palms Condo since everything has to be packed into boxes and moved into a truck for the cross island move we're making the first week in August.

I am NOT looking forward to this move, but the good news is that it's been over three years since the last one and the extra space afforded in the new house will certainly make things worth while once the dust settles.

I'm excited to be getting my own studio space in the new building where I can keep my photo and artwork supplies set up and at hand for use rather than having to stash the watercolors when I'm working on pen & ink drawings and having to put everything up when we have company.

I'm interested in getting into stained glass work and doing some ceramic pottery and other clay sculpture, so having the space to allow things to stay accessible for a couple hours of work each day should greatly increase my output and productivity.

I have at LEAST a half dozen artwork projects already started that need to be followed up on inculding marketing some prints of my pen & ink work and getting a few dozen finished works matted and framed for display and possible sale.

Working on the kitchen table and the coffee table just hasn't been condusive to getting past the prototype stage on my efforts.

OK, time for a quick snooze, then it's back to the grindstone for a half day...

As Of July 17th, The 2007 Hurricane Season Is Still A Bust...

Al Gore Changing His Panties Boxers


Heh...

.

Dirty Jobs

Mike Rowe I Ain't....


I just LOVE watching Mike Rowe's show DIRTY JOBS on the Discover Channel.

It's right up there with Deadliest Catch and the History Channel's Ice Road Truckers on my list of TV shows I can't pass up once the remote control has scanned across their broadcast.

Tonight Mike was doing a little work with a Terminte exterminating company and chipping hardened concrete out of concrete delivery trucks. I've also seen him squeezing poop out of baby chickens and pumping out septic tanks, but he does everything with style and a good deal of humor while telling stories about things even I have never seen or thought about doing.

It's a good thing that a TV crew hasn't shown up on my job site to film some of the things that have gone on there since I started work back in May.

On second thought, I guess that the Comedy Channel might be interested--maybe I should make a few phone calls.

Air Conditioned Interior

Still Hot Under The Collar...


Well, I crossed yet another construction milestone on Sunday, completing the installation of a couple of tons of electric heatpump equipment mounted through the wall of what will be the living room in the final floor plan configuration. I think that the 1959 vintage structure actually shuttered with surprise as the the cool air hit it's 47 year old concrete and timbers.

There's still a breakfast bar, kitchen sink, and old refrigerator sitting around my new modern convienance--but those items will be exiting the facility in the next construction dumpster, finally completing the transition from a duplex to a single family residence.

My thinking is that with this improvement, the interior work can be completed in civilized, mosquito-free conditions. No more stopping to wipe the sweat off my safety glasses and out of my eyes every two minutes. That's the reason I changed my schedule and accelerated the AC installation by an entire month.

James and I spent the final fifteen minutes of our workday sitting in front of the AC vents, drinking a couple of cold Hinekin beers in celebaration of our accomplishment, knowing that even when our day's work involves soffits and fascias or metal roof panels outside, that we can always come INSIDE to take a break from the 100+ degree F heat index coastal weather.

Here at home on the computer front, my HP laptop is still paralysed with Internet blindness, although the CAD software and other programs seem to be working OK thus far. Needless to say I'll be on the telephone first thing this morning--I hope that they follow up with their earlier offer of personalized support assistance because their Norton 360 software absolutely refuses to find any problem currently.

Be advised that if you are one of these weasels that takes pleasure in writing maliscious software code designed to break into complete strangers expensive hardware, and I EVER find you, I will take great pleasure in risking the legal consequences of thrashing you within inches of your miserable life.

Everyone GOT THAT???