Saturday, September 11, 2010

Crazy On A Ship Of Fools--Part MCMXXXI

If I Had The Money I'd Be Out Of Here...


Just in case you haven't been paying attention here on this blog, the bottom line these days is that if it weren't for two women--my mother and my girlfriend Pat--I'd be living somewhere other than the United By-God States of 'Merica in the near future if not for the past several years now.

OK...cash on hand and cash flow also being considerations, but still...

And where exactly I'm not sure...probably Belize or Costa Rica...but anywhere else in this hemisphere other than the place this nation is being transformed into by America despising Morons and other breeds of generic Socialists/Liberals/Progressives in recent years.

I guess I'll sit back and watch the continuing disintegration of the country I grew up in for a while longer and see what the results of the November election produces.

And until then...expect further complaining in my usual eloquent but politically incorrect form...

Friday, September 10, 2010

"Clydesdale Respect"

They Only Played It Once On TV...







A comment I found on Snopes.com from Anheuser Busch about the 2002 Super Bowl commercial commemorating the 9/11 attack and showing the vacant NYC skyline said:

We truly appreciate your interest in one of our Super Bowl 2002 commercials, "Clydesdale Respect."

As you have heard, this commercial aired only once. However, we continue to be overwhelmed by the positive response. Anheuser-Busch is proud to be an American beer company and we wanted to express ourselves in respectfully honoring those affected by the events of September 11th We are pleased that the Budweiser Clydesdales were able to deliver our sentiments in a way that has resonated with many Americans.

At this time, we have no plans to air this commercial again. Although it was available for a period of one year on our Web site, we have since chosen to update the site with fresher ads.

Looking at the attitude of many of the voters and most the politicians today...with minds made of mush and memories shorter than their next text message...I felt like reminding everyone of where we are and where we're coming from and where we're going to end up again if we don't stay vigilant.

You know?






(Thanks for remembering Rodger.)

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Qur'an Bar-B-Que Recipies

A Redneck Invitation For My Own Personal Jihad...


Is anyone but me tired of the so-called "news stories" involving some slack jawed moron/self-described preacher down in Florida's much ballyhooed public intent to burn some copies of the Qur'an (or Quaran or Koran or however you choose to spell the book)???

He couldn't just go out on E-bay or Amazon or down to the local Muslim Propaganda Book Store (Jihad-R-Us) and buy a few dozen copies and toss them in a bonfire while singing Kumbaya with his fellow in-bred parishioners...

NoooooOOOO...had to call the local news and then the ASSociated Press picked up the story and ran with it and here we all are today red faced with Generals and Senators and Secretaries of State all tossing in their two cents worth on the issue.

I've had it up to here...pointing to the top of my ever greying, ever balding head...with this insane media attention to total non-events which 100 years ago(or even 25 years ago for that matter) would slide past on the calendar without even so much as a whimper in the local news papers.

Back then we were all worried about the KKK and the Catholics fighting Baptists in Ireland and the Simbanese Liberation Army and the Unabomber and Pet Rocks and Mood Rings and other important stuff like that.

Yet today this idiot's possibly well intended and sincere announcement that he's going to burn a couple of books WHICH ARE HIS PROPERTY AND HE HAS PAID FOR has caused half the planet to go into an uproar and all of our elitist "better" governing class to come out and comment on the non-issue.

Let me remind everyone hyperventilating about this subject about a couple of things.

The American Flag is burned almost every day by "activists" in our own country and over seas.

And the Holy Bible is confiscated and desecrated by the Saudi's and Sunis and Shias as a mater of law and political tradition and we don't miss a beat chewing our TV dinners watching the 6 O'clock evening news.

And the "Code Pink" Lesbians and Trans-sexuals run around in churches splashing fake blood on old Catholic ladies and then plead to misdemeanor charges of disturbing the peace, at worse, and the folks in the state houses of NY and San Francisco and up in Washington DC simply, "tolerantly", turn their head and start talking about blaa blaa blaa "Amendment Rights" and freedom of expression.

And what's the real difference when it comes down to dotting the "I's" and crossing the "T's" except how the idiots which are insulted by the gestures respond?

You know?

Well, I have THIS to say about THAT (Qur'an burning) if you feel Americans should get all worked up about the subject after sitting through everything which has happened around here since the Vietnam War.

SCREW YOU and YOUR POLITICIANS' sniveling, self-important, introspective, sensitive, pompas attitudes.

If you insist on telling the guy he can't burn SIMPLE THINGS LIKE BOOKS which are his property because you ARE AFRAID that the radical towel headed islamofascists will hate us even more and want to kill us any more than they already do...you are CRAZY and UNINFORMED.

Many of these people are either so ignorant or so crazy they believe that their Allah--God--is actually embodied in the Qur'an just like Christians believe that Christ was our God in physical form embodied on the earth. (And while I'm at it I'll mention that my old ex-grandfather-in-law believed that the King James Version of the Bible was the literal word of God and that it was originally written in English and not Hebrew and Greek and Arabic...)

Religion makes people crazy...only here in the good old US of A a lot of people do things like frown on drinking whisky and dancing too close and adultery and cutting the grass on Sunday.

But if you want to get totally shit-faced and dance your way across your front yard naked having sex with your next door neighbor's wife while pushing your lawnmower on Sunday afternoon you might turn a few heads or cause a few fingers to wag, but we won't come over and set off an explosion with a 1000 pounds of TNT in your garage the next morning.

Understand?

Yet we all already know that these wild-eyed Muslim terrorists will use any excuse up to and including things like "it's Tuesday" or "he was wearing a Pink Floyd t-shirt" or anything else they can find to explain their actions when the smoke clears and the shrapnel lands on your Prias' hood.

And I say that there are much more serious things going on in the country and in the world to debate rather than spending 12 hours a day broadcasting news and commentary about mouth-breathing, sloped forehead people like this looking for their 15 minutes of fame.

Got it?


OK...

I'm glad we got that straightened out, and now I have to go and light my Webber Kettle using a couple of copies of the Qur'an and some hand draw cartoons of Mohammad.

I want to smoke some Hams and Pork Butts for this weekend, and Allah and Mohammad will hopefully enjoy the gesture and unique Muslim religion inspired flavor imparted therein...




(what? so sue me or come over and blow up my Redneck ass...dammit...)

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Liberals Progressives On Parade

More Insensitive Observations...


It kills me every year when inevitably, at the end of a hot dry summer, the fruits of the labors of the sniveling, booger eating, tye died, patchouli stinking tree hugging eco-friendly liberals progressives comes to bear and most of the western United by-God States of 'Merica spontaneously burst into flame.

Generally all of the loud mouthed Hollywood asshats that live out in Malibu and up in the hills overlooking downtown Los Angeles are the main ones affected, but this year the Weather Channel just showed me a bunch of Colorado Tree Huggers near Boulder lamenting the latest round of fires destroying their homes and businesses...

aided and abetted by their very own policies and programs preventing the cutting of underbrush and making controlled smoke using prescribed burns to get rid of the very kindling fueling the fires incinerating their possessions today.

These people are, by and large, the very same people which vote to pass laws and resolutions trying to keep the canyons and other wild areas they are invading for millions of dollars each in what they consider to be a "pristine" condition, while at the same time driving land costs up and the indigenous populations of wildlife and historic "poor blue collar" occupants out of the area under the guise of "zoning" and "beautification" and "conservation."

Of course millions of taxpayer dollars are being spent in hiring the services of fire fighters and air tankers, but the liberal lamestream media insists on ignoring the underlying realities of these people's conscious risk taking behavior in locating in these historically fire prone areas and the civic and government mandates which further enhance the probability of disaster.

And of course since the people look like this:




...instead of this...



and further since they aren't relying on this guy to run things:


(that would be former New Orleans' Mayor Ray Nagin)

where are the cries for FEMA assistance and the partisan blamers getting on George Bush?

Just wondering...

Hey Bill Gates...

Pay Me For My Time?


Well, here I am this morning, looking at the calendar, and reminiscing about being on about day 1001 of my love hate relationship roller coaster ride from hell living with Windows Vista on my Server.

Looking back to November 2007, there I was, with a pocket full of cash some semi-surplus funds in our checking account, looking pretty much like this guy:




when I wandered over to the Hewlett Packard website a couple of times and was finally seduced into purchasing a new "custom built" server PC with all of the bells and whistles and whirly-gigs I wanted to handle our personal and business needs for the foreseeable future...

...except...

HP had sold their soul to the devil knuckled under to Gates/Microsoft and ten days later I had a living breathing spastic metal box running...

"Windows Vista Home Premium Edition."

D A M M I T.

So now for the past nearly three years I've felt like this gentleman:




...and in spite of my best efforts and consultations with people like this young fellow:



and this guy:



and this dude:



and even this man:



...this morning after great effort and expense it seems I will have to live with the realization that I still can't shake the curse of Windows Vista.

Worst of all, just like the "Borg" on Star Trek Next Generation, me and my computer have apparently been assimilated into some sinister Microsoft Network, because I even VOLUNTARILY RE-INSTALLED VISTA last week because I couldn't get Windows 2000 XP Professional to work on the intentionally designed and corrupted machine.

And so now this morning, after doing extensive file restorations and back-up, I'm now forced to sit in my shop in my basement on my old reliable HP 17" wide screen laptop (running Windows 2000 XP Professional Media Center Edition by the way) doing my news reading and blogging because the "Server PC" is busy installing "Service Pack 1" and whatever other crap Microsoft wants to force me to download to correct the screwed up software they sold me in 2007.

And of course I'm inundated with ads trying to get me to "upgrade" to the latest and greatest product--"Windows 7"...

...a product named "Windows 7" because everyone with any sense knows that "Vista II" or "Vista 2" would have sold like a new version of the Chevy Corvair or the Ford Edsel.

So any way...I love being an American, I love growing up free until about 20 years ago, but right now I hate the state of our economy and the idiots running Adams and Jefferson's and Franklin's government and the way things are going in the computer department around here I might just buy a Macintosh in 2011.

I have to go now and soak my head in ice water before it explodes...

...and Y'all have a LOVELY day now...if you will...

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Hey...YOU There...

GET BACK TO WORK!


I know, I know I KNOW...

it's a sad day because the 90% of working Americans which actually have a job have to go back to work today.

And of course all of the kids have to go back to school (parents taking a collective sigh of relief.)

And the Summer weather is rapidly changing to fall and the Turbo Pup pool will soon be too cold to use--probably within the next two weeks.

But the seasons are changin' and I've already got leaves falling out in the yard and I guess that I'm looking forward to the cooler weather and the fall colors coming back.

We're planning a trip to the beach down on the Gulf coast in the middle of this month in order to prolong my suntan just a little longer, then I guess I'll buckle down and try to get some real work done and do some end of the year planning professionally.

Y'all have a lovely week...

Sunday, September 05, 2010

"Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night"

...Knowledgable Words On Getting Old...


Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.


--Dylan Thomas (October 27, 1914 – November 9, 1953)



(doing the math...Mr. Thomas was only 39 when he went into "That Good Night")