Sunday, August 14, 2011

Saturday Success...Simple Pleasures

I'm A Professional At Doing Nuthin All Day

I don't mind reporting to you, Ladies and Gentlemen, that I hardly did CRAP all day here on Saturday at the Turbo Pup Compound on the banks of the Mighty Tennessee River.

N U T H I N'

Not A Thing Productive.


I PLANNED my day that way more or less.

Pat wanted to go shopping in the morning over at a new "Marketplace" they've opened down the road a couple of miles in the Turkey Creek area...

so she went.


I'd have liked to have gone but they have some rules down there.

Apparently they don't let unshaven, unshowered, naked pot bellyed middle aged men in their snooty "Marketplace", and since I was too lazy to get up and shave and shower and put on clothes suitable for a public appearance I opted to stay home.

Any way, so I just stayed here and wallowed around in bed until almost eleven AM with the Turbo Pup.

Then when she (Missy the Turbo Pup) had to get up to go out and pee I got up too (because I had to also but I opted to do it inside rather out in the yard), stumbled into a bathing suit, grabbed a cigar and the newspaper, poured myself a "waker upper" drink, and set my butt down outside on the deck by the pool and didn't hardly move again until Pat came home about 1 PM.

THAT right there, in my considered Redneck Opinion, is a successful plan for a weekend day in and of itself I'd say, but then you know what?

I had another drink and sat around out there in the moderate heat until it threatened to rain, then I went inside and layed around watching FOX News and the Weather Channel and all in all a good afternoon was had by everyone here at the Turbo Pup Compound.

I did have an inkling of intention to wander over to Home Depot and Kroger late in the afternoon before dinner, but a really good late afternoon NAP ended up taking precedence.

Then Pat woke me up and threatened to go over to our local Karaoke Pub Bullfeathers and bring me back a burger.

And of course that offer forced me to get up, clean up, and get dressed so I could run out the door with my girls.  (They let the Turbo Pup sit with us there on their expansive deck, so we've taken to doing happy hour a few nights a week.)

A couple of drinks, a couple of burgers, and a couple of songs later I was back home in time to go right back to my FOX News and Weather Channel watching.

And now here I am at 1 AM Sunday morning trying to reschedule a trip to Home Depot and Kroger and try to make some more sawdust in the Wee Pub in my basement Sunday afternoon.

Hope the balance of your weekend is at least half as satisfying as mine has been thus far.

Regard Y'all...

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