Wednesday, September 27, 2006

One Sea Turtle...One Dolphin

...and A Shit-Load of Little Bitches And Bastards (Photos To Follow Shortly)


I'm sorry People, but I swear to God, I'm starting to believe that most kids these days deserve to be killed the exact instant that they exit their mother's crotches.

You see, I did what I consider to be, by my standards, a crappy sea turtle sculpture yesterday, and I went back by at sunset to spruce things up, and at sunrise this morning I found that it had survived the evening's minor tide and wave action.

I was excited...I thought "multiple sculptures would ensue."

Nope, not by 1:00 PM

Enter the Redneck asshole "Bob" (I'm making the name up) with his University of Alabama ballcap and his lovely stretchmarked silly bitch wife "Wanda" (again, a pseudonym).

"Bob" and "Wanda" have chirren, "Little Bob", and "Little Wanda" and further, "Little Bob" treats "Little Wanda" just like "Big Bob" acts out with "Big Wanda".

I saw him with his hands around his sister's neck.

Do you understand what I'm saying here?

My problem is that "Big Bob" and "Big Wanda" allow "Little Bob" and "Little Wanda" to slash up and down and up and down and up and down and up and down and up and down and up and down and up and DOWN AND UP and DOWN the beach and guess what?

"Big Bob" and "Big Wanda" don't care who or what get in the way of the way of their little deamon spawn lovely darlin's.

The kids couldn't have been a day over 5 years old.

Mr. Sea Turtle was trash by 2 PM.

But that's OK, I still carved Mr. Dolphin, and "Big Bob" and "Big Wanda" got to overhear one of my resort visitor fans tell me that the little undisciplined shitheads "Big Bob's" and "Big Wanda's" lovely chirren' had caused all of yesterday morning's damage.

I don't care if they're cute.

I don't care if they're young.

If you sit there on your stupid yuppy lard asses and let them trash things in public...

SOMEBODY IS GOING TO THE HOSPITAL (AND SOMEBODY MIGHT JUST BE GOING TO JAIL IN THE PROCESS)....

IF that's what it takes to restore some sense of civilty to our lives...SO BE IT


That will be all for now...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

OMG I know the kind of people you're talking about. Unfortunately a few of them live by me! I also hate it when their parents are standing there watching them be little heathen assholes and don't do a damned thing about it until somebody else speaks up. Then they say "oh I didn't even notice". DUH!