Monday, December 11, 2006

More Public Mischief

I have an opinion on everything…

Last Wednesday some ignorant moron lovely local citizen had a letter published in our local newspaper, The Brunswick News, expressing his belief that our little island airport should be closed.

His basic argument was threefold.

(1) The airport is unsightly.

(2) Airplanes are noisy. (duhhhhhh)

(3) Finally, given the validity of reasons (1) and (2) above, it was abvious that the County owned land the airport occupies could be put to better use as a park and green spaces.

Within five minutes of reading the letter, I wrote the following missive which was published last Friday in the letters to the editor section:

I would like to take this opportunity to offer my rebuttal to a recently published letter promoting the closing of the McKinnon St. Simons Airport.

First, I want to remind everyone that, void the actions of some supernatural or extraterrestrial forces, Glynn county’s land area hasn’t changed much since the early 1900’s when the airport was built for the US Navy.

I assert that, since all of Glynn County is not already covered with concrete, the idea of closing the airport to regain land for other public uses is dubious and renders mute the argument that the size of the airport property “detracts from the natural beauty of OUR island.”

I invite the people that want to complain about living around the airport to put their own money where their mouths and keyboards are. If they don‘t like the airport, let them buy the entire island, thereby truly making it “THEIR Island.”

I would be remiss to not remind them that, upon closing “their airport,” that they will then also have to subject themselves to the risks of not being able to get a ambulance jet or helicopter to come to their assistance when and/or IF the time comes.

Finally, while complaining about “the increase in air traffic…especially the large rent-a-jets”, I again remind the public that the airport was here first. If you didn’t want to vacation around or live in a building next to a lively operational airport, then you, your ego, and your checkbook should have gone elsewhere.

Instead of closing the airport, why don’t we all just vote to buy dump trucks and fill in the marshes and creeks?

After all, there’s a bunch of extra land out there for “public use” if you look for it hard enough…

Maxwell Raymond

I don't actually recall the name of the muttering old Curmudgeon the mis-informed gentleman that wrote the original letter, but I'm fairly certain that my response made his head spin around.

(By the way, I write my letters using my Nom de Plume “Maxwell Raymond” not because I'm afraid of public opinion, but because of personal differences which I have with the newspaper’s editor…and I believe that he probably wouldn't publish anything I wrote if he knew it was me holding the pen.)


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

never has sarcasm been put so eloquently...