Spammers, Spyware, & Viruses

My Computer Has The Flu


It would appear that the Klingons or some other aliens came down from outer space last night while I was reviewing websites on Charles Dickens' work, captured my new HP laptop, and left in it's place some kind of mutant machine designed to make me lose my mind and start throwing expensive things out the door into the Condo parking lot.

Half the time I've got pop-up windows everywhere showing God knows what kind of body parts doing God knows what to who and/or whom, and the other half of the time I've got windows opening by themselves trying to sell me spyware sweepers and "malware" cleaning programs to fix the problems I'm having.

Of course my free subscription to Norton Internet Security ran out recently and I had not gotten around to renewing it, and now I'm afraid to renew it online because I don't really believe that I'm certain where I'm at on the internet even now because of the crap that's happening when I hit the return key or click the left mouse button.

It looks like that, in addition to a trip to the theater, tomorrow I'll have to go to Staples or Circuit City to buy another shiny silver disk full of bullshit and hope for the best when it's all said and done.

In closing, let me mention that I'm adding Internet Hackers and Spammers to my list of people, along with Militant Muslims, that should expect to have their asses kicked upon sight.

If you are one of these internet shitheads that intrude on other people's computers, I WILL BEAT YOU WITH ANYTHING I CAN LAY MY HANDS ON...INCLUDING MY BARE FISTS.

You Can Bank on it
.