Auto Mechanics

I Say That They’re The Reason Shotguns Were Invented


Have I mentioned that I can fix almost anything, IF you give me a manual and the proper tools?
Well…I can…

Fix almost anything, that is.

The only problem is that if I anticipate only having to do a given procedure once in a lifetime, I realize that it would sometimes be wise to hire a professional to handle the task and bloody their knuckles and curse their way through the process.

Disk Brake pads?

No problem.

Drum brake pads?

I’ll think about it.

Radiators and water pumps and power steering pumps are another matter, however, although I have successfully done a complete engine and a couple of transmission/clutch jobs in my younger years.

I can replace an alternator in the parking lot outside the auto parts store in about fifteen minutes.

Want to bet me?

That said, right now I have a couple of things that are in need of a good fixing on my old 1995 Chevrolet Suburban that are not included on my list of specialties, and dang it if the local Dealer (I won’t name names here because they haven’t actually caused me harm or otherwise done anything wrong and don‘t have the opportunity to rebut what I‘m writing about them) hasn’t reignited the fire in my soul against auto dealers and, more specifically, Auto Dealer MECHANICS

Then there is also the unique species of subhuman called SERVICE WRITERS, that many times work in concert with the Mechanics (I'm not talking about everyone in the business, just many or most…so don’t start e-mailing me and bitching and complaining because your father or brother-in-law is a mechanic or service writer.)

It’s just that, in my experience, almost anyone with the label of “Service Writer” on them is immediately suspect to living right down there under a rock with the snails and slugs and people like bookies and loan sharks that take advantage of people and generally stink up the environment.

Where do they go to learn to be so crooked?

I almost committed mass murder and burned a Pontiac Dealership down back in the 1980’s over a new car that they sold me and couldn’t ever manage to fix, no matter how much money I paid them.

I swear that I couldn't drive to my mailbox at the end of my driveway without it breaking down.

This all happened back before Georgia passed their Auto "Lemon Laws", and the “Service Writer” actually looked at his watch one morning and told me that they didn’t open for business for another fifteen minutes, and then while smirking at me he added “If it weren’t for cars like YOURS, I wouldn’t have a job.”

My response was “ if it weren’t for fists like mine, his mouth would have a few more teeth.”

The so-called “Service Manager” handled our account from that point to the day we sold the vehicle. I ended up hating virtually everyone that worked at that dealership...but...

Any wayyy…

Yesterday I received TWO QUOTES to do some work on my aforementioned vehicle, and the one from the local Chevy Dealer was more than double the independent mechanic’s price and further, the guy would not guarantee that the number couldn’t or wouldn’t escalate once they had the bowels of my beloved truck spilled out on their dirty concrete shop floor.

I’ve got a third quote coming today, then I hope to make a decision and spend a few days being a one car family while I get my beloved Suburban back into cross country interstate shape.

After all, it only has about 183,000 miles on it…I see another ten years of gas guzzling fun on the horizon with a little investment of time and money.