Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Poetic Justice

Idiots In Traffic--A continuing Theme…


I was a complete bum most of the day today, after spending much of last night working on a couple of proposals for consulting and construction work and my continued efforts to get this new computer formatted and operational.

Then Pat and I did a late afternoon bike ride, covering the six mile round trip from our home on the marsh up to Fort Frederica in less than 40 minutes, but upon our return I was too tired to face an hour or so cooking my planned entree, authentic Chicken Curries.

As a result of my “Chickening out,” I was forced to drive a few miles south to the local deli to pick up a Greek salad and a Sub sandwich. In the process, I once again encountered another ignorant arrogant asshole one of our indigenous resident’s with a severe case of self-importance.

About half way to the Deli, buzzing along at about 36 MPH in a 35 MPH zone, I looked in my rear view mirror and all I saw was a windshield and the top of a hood ornament on a late model white Mercedes coupe.

I didn’t budge a half MPH.

As I neared my destination in the shopping center, I broke one of my cardinal rules and entered the turn lane a bit early--hoping that my co-pilot would simply continue onward at his desired higher rate of speed.

I was WRONG.

Like a member of the Blue Angels stunt team, he hung right there with me a few feet off of my rear bumper, and then made the left turn into the parking lot still “flying in formation.”

What really pissed me off was that his tight formation position caused me to drift past a couple of parking spaces, and only after he dove into one of the spaces which he caused me to miss did I manage to park twenty yards down the lot on the opposite side.

The son of a bitch had the audacity to glare at me as he virtually sprinted in the door of the deli ahead of me, placing his order…fumbling for exact change, then spending the next few minutes hiding behind the potato chip rack, impatiently drumming his fingers on the top of the stainless steel counter.

I, on the other hand, being the laid back, useless beach bum that I am, calmly placed my order and wandered around out front of the shop enjoying the nice cool evening.

When I walked back inside, I arrived just in time to witness my adversary complaining because “I know I forgot to say it…but you guys know I always have whole wheat bread with my chicken salad sandwich…”

Well now...just let me issure a giagantic "Boo hoo HooooooooooOOOO" on his behalf.

Since he was in too much of a hurry to wait another three minutes for the 16 year old kid working the counter to make a replacement sandwich, he simply left the shop in a huff.

So sad....and although he deserved it, I never said a single word to him, but he did see me smirking at his delimma.

I really hope that he perceived the rest of his evening to be as shitty as the fifteen minute portion which I witnessed.

Maybe he even managed to survive the balance of his drive home without having a heart attack...but you never know.

I, personally, refuse to live here on our little Island and be in that much of a hurry and, in spite of idiots like this fellow encountered this afternoon, thus far I think that I’m definitely getting my money’s worth.

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