Obscene Vista

Someone Send Up A Flare...


Well, I reluctantly let my computer wander all by itself out onto the Internet last night.

I told it to go to the Microsoft Website because I was tired of the machine crashing every 22 1/2 hours and otherwise unexpectedly rebooting in the middle of the night and sometimes at the worst possible moment before I hit the send button on a three page E-Mail.

So it did, and I waited like I was waiting for my sixteen year old daughter to come home from the senior prom.

Then it came back saying Mr. Gates was wanting to give us a bad dose of "Vista Service Pack 1."

Hummmmmm...I thought for a moment, then replied.

I said that I already had luggage, but it turns out this "Pack" wasn't actually of the "backpack" variety, and since God Bill Gates' company said we really needed it here in our house I reluctantly said go ahead and get it.

After all...IT'S FREE.

By the way, so's the Flu and several of Miss Pelosi's dreaded STD's, but this was supposed to be different.

It's an OFFICIAL MICROSOFT PRODUCT, by God.

So things proceeded to whirl and bang and clank and spin and vibrate for a while with unexpected messages popping up with progress bars and such, and I wandered around the house looking at yesterday's unread newspaper and FOX News and a couple of engineering texts I had laying around the office, then after a half hour and a couple of warm boots...

here I am again on the Internet this morning.

Just in case, I got out my Abacus and my stone tablets and chisels, and if you don't hear from me within the next 24 hours...

somebody please call 911...