Sunday, August 17, 2008

I Wanna' Talk About Me

Wanna' Talk About I, Wanna' Talk About #1....Oh My Me My...(With Apologies to Mr. Toby Keith)

So here I am, in the middle of the SUMMER, looking around for winter shoes and stuff to service my "Global Warming Induced Climate Accommodation Needs" since moving up here from our little island to the heartland of the US tundra the banks of the Mighty Tennessee River and I found this image (click on the picture and look closely):

The ad stressed the protection it afforded from Lyme Disease and West Nile Virus.

( I put my Lymes in my Tequila on ice and limit my travels to places not further than the East bank of the Nile river so I can rest easy most of the time without netting blocking my vision...)

Any way, it stopped me in my tracks on my keyboard for a few minutes few seconds...then I shook my head and grabbed a bag of tools and went outside to install a new flood light fixture on the corner of the carport.

Meanwhile my brain kept seeing that image of that man standing there clad in a tee shirt and denim shorts, wrapped ENTIRELY in some kind of fancy expensive mesh...


That's right You're supposed to buy this mesh stuff just to walk outside in the morning or afternoon on vacation.

Or wear it when you're AT WORK.

I'm sorry Ladies & Gentlemen, but I believe that this CRAP is just like the omnipresent Bicycle helmets (when I lived my entire life riding with my ever greying, ever balding head helmet less, with whatever hair was left over flapping in the breeze while on a bike), handrails on everything taller than 12 inches off the ground, and the Chinese/Asian propensity to wear a disposable surgical mask on the subway or in the farmers market at the Gourmet Fried Poodle Counter.

How soon will it be before everyone from the North Slope of Alaska to the thong clad topless nudists on Miami's South Beach are forced by the Fashion Police or some other government entity to wear something like this when outside of their energy efficient, eco-friendly, Lead and Mercury-free government subsidized housing modules?

I don't know about you, but I simply refuse...

(Pass me the "Off" now if you please)

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