Someone Call Fox News

I've Got A New Philanthropic Endeavor...


I was flipping around between TV channels tonight in a fit of old aged induced insomnia when a story on Food Network caught my eye. The moment I saw the idea that the people over at the Canstruction organization had I knew that I had to organize a local event here in Knoxville.


At least I'm going to try...


What they do is enlist local Engineering and Architectural Firms, and even schools and churches to solicit donations of canned food, and then they have a competition where the individual teams build intricate models, structures, and artwork using nothing but the cans and a little wire and tape for support.


Then after much fanfare at the local mall or other public venue and judging of the work by a jury of local dignitaries, the structures/artwork are photographed, torn down, and the can goods donated to local food banks and charities.

Stuff like this is possible:

You'll have to excuse me while I go play in the pantry now...

An Eighteen Foot Deep Hole In The Ground

Two Feet At A Time...


This morning I have to go back to work after yet another three day weekend.

It's a good thing, because I need the rest after living through what I did on my "days off."

Besides hauling nine panels of pre-fab picket fencing back to Lowe's (after paying them to deliver it a month ago), on Saturday I wandered over to Home Depot and came back to my driveway with TWO HUNDRED individual pickets and the lumber necessary to support them on the 4x4 posts Lowe's delivered with the faulty fence panels.

The other thing that snuck into my truck on the way home was one of these:



That would be a little "One Man" Auger designed to make holes in your yard for fence posts or plants.

On the first hole my rented auger drilled itself into the hard Kentucky clay so deep that it could not be extracted with human strength (limited as I am by recent maladies.)

Fortunately my auger was stuck against an old clothes line post to which I could connect my "come-along" and jack the little beast out of the ground.

After drilling about four two foot deep fence post holes, my auger needed one man and one woman to hold it stable and keep it from killing someone in the hole drilling process.

After about two hours there were nine nice clean post holes spaced on 12 foot increments along the sides of Missy the Turbo Pups new pen enclosure country recreational compound.

Yesterday the rain delayed most of the outdoor progress although I did manage to get four fence posts set and one 12 foot section of fence put together. Thank God for my air compressor and finish nail gun.

While the rain was falling I managed to get wire shelving installed in the guest room closet, leaving the office closet awaiting my efforts tonight after I finish another eight hours of injuneering.

All I want to know is...Who's idea was this any way?

Government Inaction In Action

We Have A Severe Lack Of Space "Facilities"


Will somebody tell me what the heck is going on over at NASA, otherwise known as the National Aeronautic and Space Administration?

First, nearly half of the "probes" that have been launched toward Mars in the past forty years have not made it, then they tell us that it's going to take until the year 2015 to get back to the moon on President Bush's mandate, and finally now we find out that the restroom on the so called "International Space Station" is a one hole'er.

That's right my fellow taxpaying ladies and gentlemen, we're sending a couple of guys and gals up into space to live for months at a time and to be visited every now and then by a Shuttle full of visitors, and all they have is a single toilet to handle nature's urges when the time comes.

What ever happened to having a back up system?

Is this the way we want our scientists and engineers handling things?

And another thing...why is it taking us seven or eight more years to get back to the moon, when we did it in less time back in the 1960's with a bunch of guys wearing pocket protectors and using slide rules to solve the formulas.

Is it a BUDGET PROBLEM?

Why don't we all pass the collection plate and make a donation to NASA to pay for a second toilet on the space station?

All I ask is that we just keep Congress out of the process, else they'll add some kind of resolution on Iraq and funds to build a new outhouse in every town in every state in the Union.

All I know is that it's a good thing I'm too old to be an astronaut and go to the Space Station, because after a pot of coffee and a few bran muffins in the morning I'm afraid that the entire crew would have to abandon ship when I opened the bathroom door and the fumes burned out the computer system and warped the Dilithium Crystals.

On second thought, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned that....

R.I.P. Harvey Korman

Your Friends Miss You...

Image stolen from here.

Join Me In Belching Some Carbon

Urrrrrrrpppppppp


I was wandering around the Internet this morning and was quite pleased to find out that I am no longer alone in my TOTAL DISDAIN for the global warming guilt trip currently gripping much of our planet.

The folks over at Grassfire.org are planning a "Carbon Belch Day" where they want people to waste as much energy as possible on June 12 by "hosting a barbecue, going for a drive, watching television, leaving a few lights on, or even smoking a few cigars."

I'd like to add burning a few old tires, having a bonfire, or leaving your gas guzzler idling in the driveway all day to that list, as I wrote in "My Personal Earth Day" back on Earth Day on April 22.

Time to go take a nice long water and energy wasting shower and go do some engineering now...

Aren't You Glad We All Have Government?

Busy Protecting Ourselves From Ourselves...


This morning, for your reading enjoyment, I offer this story about a woman in England who has been told by her local officials that she needs A LIFEGUARD AND SPECIAL INSURANCE for her toddler's 2' deep wading pool:

PORTSMOUTH, England, May 27 (UPI) -- A Portsmouth, England, grandmother says her local government has ordered her to have a lifeguard on duty for the 2-foot-deep wading pool she put in her yard.

Lourdes Maxwell said she has been putting the small pool out in her yard at the start of summer for more than 20 years for her children, grandchildren and neighborhood kids to play in, The Daily Mail reported Tuesday.

However, she said the city council issued a health and safety edict ordering her to empty the pool after she wrote the council to seek permission for a larger pool outside her house. Maxwell said she contacted her member of Parliament, who convinced the city to allow Maxwell to keep the pool, provided she pays for insurance and has lifeguards watching the pool at all times.

"I asked around for insurance and they just laughed at me. No one offers insurance for paddling pools," Maxwell said. "I'm always there to supervise but they're trying to tell me I need lifeguards for a kiddies' pool as well -- it's crazy."

I'll save the blithering and let you make up your own mind here because I'm fairly certain my regular readers know where I stand on this kind of bureaucratic crappola, other than to say that you can expect this kind of "nanny state" mentality to continue to creep into your life while you're busy working to pay for your house, kids, and cars.

Next we have this story which strikes a little closer to home here in Tennessee about a rare bottle collector that had his million dollar collection of Jack Daniels bottles (full of Jack) stolen by the Government:

NASHVILLE - Prosecutors and defense attorneys are negotiating to settle the case of a Nashville-area man indicted on charges of illegally possessing up to $1 million worth of Jack Daniel's whiskey.

Randy Piper, 47, of Goodlettsville is free on $25,000 bond and is due in court in Lynchburg on Aug. 12 to have a trial date set.

But District Attorney General Charles Crawford and Raymond Fraley Jr., Piper's attorney, both said they are optimistic the case can be resolved.

Piper was indicted in Moore County last January after state liquor officials seized 2,400 bottles in October following a tip that someone was selling alcohol without a license. They raided two warehouses owned by Piper and a home in Lynchburg, the small town about 65 miles southeast of Nashville where the famous Tennessee sipping whiskey is distilled

...

Piper, a plumber, has said he's a collector of Jack Daniel's bottles, and Fraley has said his client was singled out for selling one bottle for approximately $350 and charged with illegally possessing the others.

"It's unfortunate it got this far for one bottle of whiskey," Fraley said. "They took his entire collection when there are collectors around Moore County (Lynchburg) who possess a lot of bottles of whiskey."

...

ABC officials have said the value of the seized liquor has possibly been driven up by the value of the antique bottles, which range from 3 liters to half-pints.

One seized bottle dates to 1914, with its seal unbroken. ABC agents have estimated its value at about $10,000.

Piper and his attorney have claimed that Piper was selling collectible bottles, not whiskey.

...

"The ABC (Alcoholic Beverage Commission) and my office have tried to coordinate what Mr. Piper should get back and what should be destroyed or put in a museum," Crawford said.

Can you believe this CRAP?

The government of the by-God State of Tennessee has gone out and taken a citizen's property, paid for over a lifetime with his hard earned after tax dollars, and is in the process of "collecting" the "illegal bottles" from their rightful owner considering placing them in a museum...while at the same time hiding behind "bootlegging laws" and preventing the owner of the bottles from enjoying the profit from their sale.

Either they are collectors items or they are illegal alcohol...they can't have it both ways, I believe.

If the bottles contained urine samples, ketchup, or "Dr. Rogers Funky Foot Remedy" and somehow there was a collectors market for the sealed containers everything would be hunky dorry, but because it's Tennessee's most famous liquor, produced in a county of the state where it is still illegal to sell alcohol on a retail basis in the year 2008, this poor guy has been arrested, sent to jail, and forced to post bond to gain his freedom.

Are YOU happy with the governments of the world spending YOUR tax dollars protecting you from women with unguarded, uninsured wading pools and vendors of antique liver killing fluids?

Or wouldn't you rather just go back to the idea of the government promoting your right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" and let the individual decide the meaning of same?

That will be all...for now...

New US Map

Simple Enough???

(Don't EVEN start on me...I'm equally insensitive to most EVERYBODY...)

Quote O' The Day

Listen Up...


"A slip of a foot you may soon recover, but a slip of a tongue you may never get over."

"At 20 years of age the will reigns, at 30 the wit, at 40 the judgment."

"Be civil to all; sociable to many; familiar with few; friend to one; enemy to none. "

"God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. "

Ben Franklin (1706-1790)



And finally...this gem:

"As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything."

George Carlin (1937- )

New Book

Look At What I'm Bidding On On E-Bay...





Yes, that's a 1957 first printing edition of Ayn Rand's epic "Atlas Shrugged"...all 1,100 plus pages worth.

Why don't you go buy yourself a copy and loan it to a couple of your favorite fascist, socialist liberal friends to read before this November's election.

I AM Not THAT Old

Am I?


So we went out and saw some grown man & woman get married yesterday.

Upon arrival at the church I thought that I knew and had gone to school with the Bride's parents, but clearly I was mistaken as I cannot be old enough to have a daughter her age.

Then we went and stuffed ourselves with food and drink at the reception, and I saw all of these people that went to College with us in Atlanta and they were all grey headed middle aged men.

There I stood with my ever greying, ever balding pony tailed adorned skull, scratching various body parts and wondering what had happened.

I finally cleared my mind by understanding that Bill & Beth's family had been living in an alternate universe in North Carolina, sponsored by scientists at Duke University, causing time to pass more quickly than the speed the clock clicked down in Alabama, Georgia, and Florida in the years since we first met in 1977.

Then I thought..."But wait, it's 2008, and Curt was born when...1985?"

So SHE IS 23, and...

I AM THAT OLD.

Excuse me while I schedule my hair system transplant and go join a health club...

pffearPeerless

I Have A Nose For Good Food...


Being a contrarian, instead of taking the interstate route that involved the shortest distance between Knoxtown (my new name for our suburb of Knoxville--not quite the main city, not quite Farragut, but Lovell is too hard to explain to people) and Charlotte, we ventured northeast on I-40 and I-81 before turning back to the southeast toward our final Saturday destination.

After a few brief hours in the car, I could hardly believe it when we arrived at the local Holiday Inn in Johnson City Tennessee and found the Peerless Restaurant, founded nearby in 1938, DIRECTLY ACROSS THE STREET FROM OUR ABODE FOR THE EVENING.

We unloaded our luggage and the sea chests and lockers belonging to our little Missy the Turbo Pup into the room, delivered fresh water and food after allowing her to make a much needed "pit stop" on the lawn of the puppy friendly hotel, then wandered across the street for dinner.

Great place, all in all, with pictures of Bob Hope and Tennessee Ernie Ford in the foyer and a waiter that had grown up first eating at the old location and now working as an adult in the new 1990 vintage building.

Other than that, the best news thus far is that there is another Peerless restaurant just down the street from our house in Knoxtown!

...needless to say we can hardly wait to get back home next week.

1800 Blog Postings

Mind Racing...Head Spinning...



Actually ladies and gentlemen, this represents essay number 1801 since things got started in my little sector of the Bloggosphere back about 45 months ago.

I really wish I had more to say these days, even if it were profanity laced partisan BS, but instead I'm spending my time being something I haven't spent much time doing in years...

I'M PRODUCTIVE ( as opposed to re-productive?)

Any way...

If daytime engineering projects and evening marketing plan development weren't enough, now I'm facing a Memorial Day weekend trip across the mountains to Charlotte, North Carolina to witness the daughter of a couple of college friends get married Saturday afternoon.

As I just recalled, Curtis was born the day after her parents, Bill and Beth, rode out a tornado in my little S-10 Blazer with my wife of the day and myself up on Windy Hill Road in Marietta, GA on our way to dinner in early 1984 (?).

The wind howled, the little SUV shook, and after having to come to a complete stop in the five lane road because of the green sky and zero visibility, when the wind died down and the rain ceased we were astonished to find a mobile office trailer from an adjacent shopping center construction site blown down an embankment and shattered to pieces in the roadway just ahead of us.

Twenty five yards could have possibly made the difference between a blank page and you're ability to read these words this morning; and there might not be a beautiful young bride and beaming parents adjacent to the altar this weekend had providence and the hand of God not stopped us at that point in the roadway that evening.

Who says I'm not one lucky son of a gun in spite of my best efforts to the contrary?

Quote O' The Day

And Some Political Commentary...


Fellow writer and personal Idol Samuel Clemmons is attributed to saying (or writing) these words:

"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer."

"When angry count four; when very angry, swear."

Likewise, I say that enjoying the misfortune or suffering of those you disagree with philosophically is similar in a fashion to cursing and swearing.

Thus my silence to date here on this blog regarding Senator Ted Kennedy's recent medical problems.

Needless to say that I don't personally like the baby brother of President JFK (although I've never met the man and he's never done anything to me outside of passing some ridiculous legislation since coming into office in 1962.)

It's just that simple...

I think that he's done some bad things in his life and been cut slack socially and legally because of his position in society.

Then again, who am I to comment on the pressures and pitfalls brought upon a young (or middle aged or old) man residing in the social and political position which Senator Ted has occupied for the past 76 years?

I've learned as a mature adult that it takes a better, more intelligent Man or Woman to state your case and express your position when under pressure or distress without using profanity, and I also believe that we elevate the level and meaning of the ongoing political dialogue by wishing Senator Kennedy the best as a human being while at the same time disagreeing with some of the things he's done in the past and any leftist leanings he may continue to force upon us from his bully Senate pulpit in the future.

Thus my silence, but in breaking it I offer my best wishes for a complete and speedy recovery to Massachusetts' elder statesman.

New Engineering Technology

Beam Me Up Scotty...


I can hardly wait to get back in front of my office computer tomorrow morning.

You see, if things go as planned not only will I be driving AutoCAD 2009, but I'll also have a copy of Bentley Systems' STAAD 2006 finite element software residing on my hard disk by around 7 AM.

Yeah...I know...I know...I know...

EVERYONE doesn't appreciate having $7,000 worth of new programs that don't play music videos or sell you used books or E-bay auction items.

Still, I'll be lucky enough to be sitting in front of one of the baddest engineering terminals in our building on a daily basis (one of only three seats with AutoCAD 2009) as my importance continues to increase and I demonstrate my value as a businessman and engineer.

As of Tuesday afternoon I have permission to charge hours to the Business Development account, and I'm writing a marketing plan to expand our industrial duct system business into new areas and include my steel and fiberglass stack experience in our offerings.

I swore that I was out of the stack business on a daily basis for good after things went south in 1999 with my old corporation, but I guess eight years of being a professional beach bum balmed my spirit and allowed the smoldering embers left from the old fires to re-ignite.

You can just call me an old softy...I guess...

Happy 100th Birthday Mr. Stewart

(1908-1997)

Say What?

You Actually Want This Man In Charge?


"We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times ... and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK," Obama said.

(Obama in Oregon last weekend...)

My Answer?

If I manage to pay for it with the money left over after government gets through stealing "their fair share of my income", then I'll keep my $#@&* house at 62 degrees in the summer and 82 degrees in the winter, eat Fillet Mignon three meals a day Sunday through Friday and Pizza with diamonds and Rubys on it Saturday, and leave my Suburban idling in the driveway 24/7 and I defy the morons in Washington to tell me to do otherwise.

All you socialist treehugging bastards need to start packing your bags and heading on out to Cuba before my Alzheimer's kicks in and I start buying a new scope and ammunition for my 30-06.

Dammit...

Back To The Grind

Livin' In Suburbia...


Just in case you didn't notice, I took yesterday off.

Not completely "off," I just did what I wanted to to all day, so instead of writing I took a nice nap, and then I went to Sherwin Williams to buy some paint and used it to attack the linen closet in the master bathroom.

When the dust settled, the three old wooden shelves were laying in the basement floor and in their place was four new pieces of vinyl coated wire shelving.

Other than that, I was basically useless and I feel a little guilty as a result. I hope I get over it soon...

Any way, it's time to go to work now...hope everyone has a lovely week doing whatever it is that you elect to spend your time doing.

Things That Make My Life worth living Easier

Simple Pleasures


In the kitchen there's this contraption...




In the car this strange thing keeps Pat from getting lost in a new town while I'm at work...

And when I get another boat, this old friend will tell me where I've been and where I need to go at the end of the day:



Life truly is grand, even if I can't see the Ocean.

Fruits Of My Labor

A Weak Day Week Day Off...


Well folks, I can check "Work Week II" off the old To-Do list this morning.

So far so good, and working four ten hour days every other week to get in my 40 hours will definitely yield benefits necessary to balm my professional beach bum spirit...

...two three day weekends every month this summer, without taking a day of vacation!!!

How cool is that?

Meanwhile, even though today is a well earned "holiday", I plan on spending the morning putting together two of my patented home made Pizzas--one Hawaiian and one "Garbage" (everything)--and delivering them to the lunch room at my new office about noon today.

I let the word leak out earlier and one guy (Russ) that's on my "four-ten" schedule is driving in for lunch even though he's supposed to be off today because he can't stand missing the event.

I hope I don't freeze up under the pressure...wish me luck...if you will.

Quote O' The Day

More Samuel Clemmons...


"It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them." (would someone please call John sKerry?)

"I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -- you see, I have friends in both places."

"Few sinners are saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon."

"Sometimes too much drink is barely enough."

"Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody."

--Samuel Clemmons (1835-1910)

And finally, this original proverb:

"All work and no play makes me a dull boy..."

--Sir Virgil Rogers (1959- )

Quote O' The Day

Hark...


"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever."

-Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

Buddy Rich Plays The Drums

(With A Little Jerry Lewis Thrown In For Laughs)

Pipe Dream II

More Digital Illusions...

Quote O' The Day

Listen....


"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they are going to feel all day."

Then there is this insightful gem:

"I'm gonna live until I die."

- Frank Sinatra


More (a few minutes later)...

“All day long, they lie in the sun, and when the sun goes down, they lie some more.”


“I like intelligent women. When you go out, it shouldn't be a staring contest.”

“When lip service to some mysterious deity permits bestiality on Wednesday and absolution on Sunday, cash me out.”

“Oh, I just wish someone would try to hurt you so I could kill them for you.”


And finally...the greatest Sinatra line of ALL TIME:

“Do be do be do.”

Successful Week Ends

None Too Soon...


Dang am I ever happy that this past week is over with. Not to say that we didn't get a heck of a lot accomplished, but I can't expect to continue the pace I had set for myself and maintain my sanity and ever improving health.

To start the week out, my delinquent Suburban unexpectedly arrived by auto carrier late Monday afternoon--undamaged.

Then as the week unfolded I actually was busy at work catching up on using AutoCAD 2006 while developing a couple of projects for a Coke (as in steel mill Coke, not the soft drink) facility up in Ohio.

Meanwhile I worked six out of seven of the past evenings for at least three hours finishing up the design and drawings for the Mississippi stack project. The calcs and drawing go to the customer later this morning.

Missy the Turbo Pup had a busy week keeping everyone in line with her little herding standards, then she finished with a flourish by JUMPING OUT OF THE BASKET ON PAT'S BICYCLE WHILE ROLLING DOWN THE ROAD AT 10 MPH.

I was driving at the time and freaked out as she lept over the front of the bike, but other than bruising her ego apparently she was uninjured by the impromptu gymnastic feat. I scooped her up and hauled her little butt home without further incident.

Then we learned by telephone that our old Condo neighborhood at Sea Palms on St. Simons took a direct hit by a tornado late yesterday afternoon. I hope everyone is OK down there, but I'm glad we're a few hundred miles north of the action this morning.

This week will feature work during the day and continued organization of my home office and basement workshop--areas that have been neglected thus far in our efforts to move in and settle down into a new ritual in a new setting.


Hope you all have a lovely week, and I'll try to come up with something glib to rant about now that I've got a little spare time on my hands.

Am I Totally Wrong?

To Put Grecian Formula on my body hair?


OH Yeah...you know what I'm talkin' about ladies and gentlemen...that hair that started out living up there on top of my 6 foot plus frame... and now resides in other lower level places (other than on my face and on top of my knotty head...)

Can you say RHETORICAL Question?

(Regardless of your position on the matter,now I dare you to try to put THAT mental picture out of your shuddering head this evening (whether you actually know me or not...)

Haaaah...Got 'Cha...

PS: I really didn't do it...I just thought of it for a while and wrote about it because I'm desperate for Blog content.

'Nother Day...

...'Nother Dollar


If you don't count entertaining guests, I'm happy to report that I did virtually nothing after 5 PM yesterday for the first time in a month.

Wooo Hoooooooooooo...

What I did was that I managed to get finished with a quickie project at my day job by 4 PM and was home a few minutes later, then after another round of hanging artwork for Pat and Ski I spent a few hours co-hosting our first Open House party.

I think a good time was had by all, and when I laid my head on my pillow a little after ten, the next thing I knew it was nearly daylight and the computer and the spreadsheets were sitting here alone, feeling neglected.

So sue me...

Pre--Occupation

Is THAT...What I Used To Do For A Living?


Constipation...

Consternation...

(Pre)Occupation...

They're basically all the same in my book.

Each one inevitably leads to the other.

Think about that bit of keen insight while I get back to work this morning.

(...and BTW, I know that you are happy I pointed that out... you're welcome.)

Calculating My Existence

Anyone Have A Slide Rule???


It looks like I'm going to pay dearly for taking most of the past eight or so years off.

Who's idea is it to have to do everything on a deadline anyway?

My whole existence is now a series of white knuckle professional milestones, with my evening leisure time consisting of rearranging furniture and hanging art on my walls (our friend the interior decorater flew into town yesterday and I was forbidden to hang anything until she arrived), a little sleep, then my evening stack consulting job kicks in about 3 AM.

Time to head out to the day job now...hope y'all have a nice Tuesday.

Twelve Years Ago

A Loss That Still Hurts Every Day...


Twelve years ago this morning I was sitting in my boat on a lake in South Carolina preparing to celebrate Cinco de Mayo.

Then I received a call on my cell phone that changed my life forever.

My Father had passed away earlier that morning.

I parked my boat on it's trailer, drove it back to my friend's house to collect my belongings, and then began an eleven hour saga back through Atlanta to check on my cats, then on to southern Alabama.

That seemed like the longest drive I've ever taken, even though I've covered greater distances in a single day before and since.

Needless to say I don't celebrate on May 5th any longer.

My father was an exceptional man.

Husband and parent first.

A complete Gentleman.

Christian.

A gifted test pilot and electrical engineer.

What else could you ask for, except his presence today?


Miss you Dad...

Meteor Shower Tonight

Take A Bath With Me In The Cosmic Glow...


Being an Astronomy nerd, I elect to get E-mail notifications of things going on in the sky from a website called Spaceweather.com. The really send out some interesting stuff and if you're inclined to wander outside in the middle of the night and take a look at what they're talking about I think that you'll rarely be disappointed.

Tonight we'll see the peak of the "ETA AQUARID METEOR SHOWER", an event caused by the Earth passing through the dust trail left by Halley's Comet each year.

They claim that if you will look to the eastern sky before twilight sunrise on Monday and Tuesday morning you can expect to see as many as 70 meteors per hour (a little over 1 per minute for the Florida grads.)

Grab a coat and a lawn chair and meet me outside about 4:30 AM, if you will...

I Am A FREAKING GENIUS

Worship My Pants...


Dang I'm Tired...This working for a living is harder than I thought.

Add to the new day job the tasks of finally finishing removing my life and possessions from boxes and having to spend the evenings and weekend trying to explain my stack calculations to some old Geezer an insultingconsulting engineer with an apparent agenda counter to my best interests, and you can understand why I'm tired.

I just spent three hours writing an Excel spreadsheet to do something called a Wind Gust Response Factor calculation to prove that some numbers I routinely use are correct. I lost all of my stack design software in the house fire a few years ago and I've been slowly re-writing each section as each job requires the data.

Any way, having run a few thousand gust factor calculations over the past 25 years, I've basically settled on numbers between 1.0 and 1.5 for most of my designs, and I let my big right toe my gut tell me what to use on each project.

On the current new design on the Mississippi coast I used a 150 mile wind velocity with a 1.5 gust factor.

Massive bitching and complaining ensued, because our customer failed to tell me that their customer--a petroleum company--had their own standards and required a 183 MPH design wind loading with a .85 gust factor.

Problem is, the 0.85 number is for short fat stiff structures like buildings, and I have a tall flexible structure with a frequency of around 1 Hertz, but I could see an inquisition coming featuring highly educated people whose experience with stacks consisting of designing two or three and having stood by a smokestack once in a paper mill.

I, on the other hand, have designed and built (and in some cases installed) over 400 stacks in my career and by default have a pretty good idea what is going on with tall thin tubes standing around with smoke coming out of their tops.

So any way, I just finished the spreadsheet and ran some test numbers to check the accuracy, then I plugged in my stack design and guess what???

The actual gust factor is 1.472!!

For those of you that went to Georgia or LSU, 1.472 easily rounds up to my original number of 1.5.

It's time for a celebratory cocktail, I think...

Quote O' The Day

Personal Knowledge Squared...


"It really sucks having evolved into being an "old fart" and having to explain to highly educated and credentialed idiots why they know absolutely nothing about what they are talking about..."

--Sir Virgil Rogers

Quote O' The Day

Listen And Learn


Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened.

-Sir Winston Churchill

Words To From The Wise

Genius Thought...Distilled Into Written Words


I was cruising around the Internet in a late night moment of insomnia, and found Thomas Sowell's latest article, entitled "Don't Get Weak"

Check it out...

Our education system, our media, and our intelligentsia have all been unrelentingly undermining the values, the traditions, and the unity of this country for generations and, at the same time, portraying as “understandable” all kinds of deviance, from prostitution to drugs to riots.

The home run records that made Babe Ruth famous have been broken but one of his records will probably never be broken — pitching the longest shutout in World Series history, 14 innings. Few pitchers go even nine innings these days.

“Global warming” seems to be joining “diversity,” “gun control,” “open space,” and a growing list of other subjects where rational discussion has become impossible — and where you are considered a bad person even for wanting to discuss it rationally.

I wish that I were THAT smart (and eloquent in my writing ability.)

New Engineering Job...Day ONE a Success

And The Boxes Were Still Waiting For Me When I Got Home


New Dell Computer with 22" monitor.

Premium Cubicle next to the Chief Engineer and President's office.

Lunch with the Operations Manager.

Turbo Pup kisses at the end of the work day.

Nice pasta dinner courtesy of Pat.

Big fat Cigar with a glass of Porto in the porch swing at sunset.

Who could ask for more?

UPDATE:

I almost forgot...The stupid auto transport company called and they're retrieving my Suburban from the driveway of our old house on our Little Island tomorrow afternoon.

With any luck it will be up here on the banks of the mighty Tennessee River sometime in Mid-May...Call me an optimist...

Distant Relatives Arrive For Short Visit?

Old Building Goes Home


Take a look at the goings on at my house this afternoon:







I'd like to tell you that you're looking at Gypsies hauling the world's largest outhouse, but in reality our neighbor Susan, the daughter of the man who built that cute little storage building next door in about 1965 was reclaiming it from the end of our driveway.

Apparently her Dad sold the building to the previous owner of our new house in the mid 1970's and it's resided here ever since. (She lives a few houses further down the road today.)

I was happy to give it to her and help her load it on the trailer behind the old "Hippie Wagon" because it saved me the trouble of cutting it apart with a chain saw and throwing it into a dumpster later this spring. I must admit that I was worried about the brakes on the old VW bus handling things going down our driveway, but they made it out of sight up the street and I washed my hands of any responsibility.

I guess that everyone was happy at the end of the day except the resident Groundhog who will probably have to relocate before Missy the Turbo Pup finds her/him and we have to call in a backhoe to dig her out of the hole located under the old foundation.

Twelve Dollar Pizza

And Last Vestiges Of Freedom

I was cranking around this morning doing some AutoCAD work on the California stack project when my camera caught my eye laying here on the coffee table. I've been holding it in my hand a little over the past week in an attempt to document our transition from our little Island to the shores of the mighty Tennessee River.

Here's a last look of the island house (with the now abandoned Suburban sitting in the driveway) as we pulled away for the last time:

and the approach to the bridge over the intercoastal:



with a teary eyed view looking north across the marsh:



Finally, here's a photo of last night's dinner, one of my patented home made pizzas...the first meal cooked in the new kitchen:


(double click on that photo and look at the enlarged image...hungry now?)

I was doing a little math in my head as I gazed lovingly at my culinary creation--awaiting it to cool off to a temperature somewhere below that of a thermonuclear explosion where it could be cut and handled onto plates--when I realized that I make a nice $12 pizza.

That's right, even working from "scratch", at home, with a pound of Mozzarella, green olives, black olives, a quarter pound of sliced pepperoni, a half pound of crumbled Feta Cheese, and portebella mushrooms on top of a chunky tomato sauce and bread flour based crust--if you ignore the three hours of labor to put it all together my pizza costs...

TWELVE DOLLARS.

Pat and Missy the Turbo Pup appreciate my efforts, and that's all that really matters to me.

Time to open some more boxes...

The Boxes Are Winning

But Computers Found


I'm happy to report that I managed to dig through the boxes labeled "office" and locate the balance of our server computer last night along with enough cables to get one of the printers working.

Thirty eight pages of technical specifications and a few spreadsheets later I was too tired to read any more or write anything clever early this morning, thus the late posting.

The rain finally blew out of here yesterday morning and the temperature dipped down into the upper thirty's over night, allowing me to test our old ceiling heat system and the heat pump. I was afraid to look at the weather forecast for our little island because the only thing left there besides my heart is my Suburban--endlessly stuck in "dispatcher hell" of the transport company.

Our impressions of Knoxville continue to evolve in a positive manner, but I almost feel guilty for liking the place after years ago committing to spending the rest of my life adjacent to the ocean.

I've got two more days of freedom left before re-entering the confides of a 9 to 5 workplace, something I haven't done since 1989. I learned from the human resources manager yesterday that I'm eligible to work four ten hour days, every other week, giving me a three day weekend twice a month.

My response was "heck yeah...where do I sign?"

Now I guess it's back to the land of mystery boxes as I finish up the kitchen and office arrangement...and of course the obligatory trip to Lowe's and Home Depot to buy more stuff I'll have to pack up and move again in the future.

When will I ever learn?

Rainy Day In Georgia Tennessee

Boxes Have My Full Attention...


Pat and I are starting to think that someone is sneaking into our new house at night and delivering extra boxes while we're asleep.

We've made the obligatory visit to Home Depot and/or Lowe's every day (usually both) and as a result the kitchen is in good shape, we have a livable living room, and the master bedroom is usable although there are still piles of clothes and linens laying around needing attention.

Needless to say my Blogging is suffering, but in the mean time, check out this video:



If you like it, go to their website http://www.animusic.com/ and buy something...I have to go open boxes now...

Live...From Knoxville

Tired Home Owners


I hate to admit this morning that I'm not sure which property is more of a pain in the posterior:

my new old house full of boxes in Tennessee,

or my old old slumlord rental renovation property down on the Georgia coast.

Both locals still need tons of work to be considered finished, and after all my time and effort expended to date the only thing standing between me and the completion of my vision(s) is a sweaty aching back and lots of...

MoNeY.

Regardless of the daunting task ahead, Pat and Missy the Turbo Pup seem to be quite happy with our new abode.

I'm just happy I have most of a week to finish tearing open boxes before I have to return to the 9 to 5 world.

Oh well, at least I'm not a professional politician or living in a hut Mexico...

Loan Closed

Internet On, Life Still In Boxes


Film on TV a 11 PM...

Word To The Wise

Forced Into Banking On "Professionals"


Saying that Pat, Missy the Turbo Pup, and I are tired would be a gross understatement, but other words escape me this morning.

I have to admit that I am personally more than just a little pissed off over a phone conversation I had yesterday...but I'll get over it because I refuse to let anything get in the way of enjoying the moment.

Any way...after spending the night in the Atlanta suburb of Vinnings, later this morning we have to be in an office located in Tennessee, three hours north of here with a certified check in our hands in order to complete our current business transaction.

For those of you in the fiduciary business, and for those of you considering a lifetime of working for a company which derives it's income from fees and charges relating to the daunting task of holding on to other peoples' hard earned money (that would be banks, savings & loans, and brokerage houses)...

Understand my thinking this morning:

When a so called "customer" (that would be me) calls and explains that they (that would be I) don't have time to stand around in a line at a teller window waiting on someone to type the words "xxx tens of thousands of dollars" (plus or minus) on a carbon laden piece of paper, and you (that would be the "customer non-service representative") tell them (that would be me) that it doesn't matter how much money I have in your "institution"...the only way for them (that would be yours truly, the so called "customer", "depositor," et. al.) to retrieve their (me, my, or I's) money is to stand in the aforementioned line for the aforementioned check to be produced...

In other words, if I want my money I have to stand in line while everyone behind me huffs and puffs and snorts as the bank teller pecks away with two fingers on the typewriter containing the Cashier's Check....

That said, then...

YOU (the aforementioned customer non-service representative ), should not be surprised when I (that would be me, the aforementioned depositor) demand not only the originally desired certified check be delivered, but the remainder of my ENTIRE DEPOSIT BALANCE in your "institution" (that would be the bank, savings and loan, or brokerage house), in CASH, right now, while I sign the form closing the aforementioned account.

"I'll take the entire sum in small bills, and right now you're lucky I don't want it tendered (to me, myself, and I) in Euros and/or Pesos."

You're also fortunate my really big hammer is packed away on a truck with the rest of my sharp, pointy objects...

Dammit...

Clowns To The Left Of Me...Jokers To My Right

Here I Am...Stuck In The Middle with...WHO?


Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm excited to report that we managed to do it again yesterday.

By "it" I mean overflowing our stuff out of a house and into a giant truck--this time owned by Allied Van Lines--and onto the interstate.

At times "it" wasn't pretty, and if "it" had occurred a month ago I couldn't have done "it" because of my diminished physical condition.

That said, several times I wanted to find an empty corner in one of the bedrooms and lay down in the floor to rest, but my ever increasing Male ego wouldn't let me be completely outdone by the two polite twenty-something kids Allied had sent us to handle the nitty gritty of the proceedings.

The event was over with by a little after five PM yesterday, but in reality I still had have a pile of "unshippable crap" left laying in the garage, along with a perfectly good Chevy Suburban sitting in my driveway.

Now we're faced with wandering back over to the scene of the crime there this morning before jumping on the interstate toward Knoxville while I raise a little Hell with the Auto Transport Company (which shall remain un-named at the present time)about not picking up my truck full of odds and ends yesterday.

Based on this "hiccup" and schedule change, it looks like we'll be driving as far as Atlanta tonight, then blasting on up to Knoxville Friday morning in order to make it to the loan closing table by 10:00 AM.

All I want to know is...WHo's IDEA WAS THIS ALL ANYWAY?

AAAAAhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHH

Please Excuse Me While I Lose My Mind


We're behind in our packing efforts, and it's my fault because...

well...just because.

The balance of the garage and kitchen still looms, and the truck is supposed to be here at 8:30.

Wish us luck...If you will...

11:20 AM UPDATE

The truck driver got lost and a late start, so thank God we had an extra hour before the handtrucks started flying around.

I think we'll pull this thing off without holding up the process

My Personal Earth Day

Help Me Offset Owl Gore's Giant Carbon Footprint...


Good Gosh but things have gotten complicated when it comes to Government regulations affecting what you can and can not pack in your stuff when moving.

The "No Explosives" rule I understand for obvious reasons, but "No batteries?"

No cleaning solutions?

No paint?

What about fingernail polish--does that count as paint?

And what about the contents of the liquor cabinet?

Screw it...since I'm paying the freight tab I'm tossing whatever I want to into a box labeled "photos" and I dare the Feds to say anything to me in route or on the other end.

For those of you that are interested, in addition to spending today filling and tapeing giant cardboard boxes, here's my plans regarding the celebration of "Earth Day"

6:00 AM ... Pass Gas (Done)

6:15 AM... Pass More Gas (very satisfying sound...with a slight hint of last night's steak dinner)

6:31 AM... Take giant swig of water and belch heartily

7:04 AM...Throw away batteries from portable devices

7:30 AM...Dump solvents down kitchen drain

7:59 Am...Start up Suburbans 454 cubic inch gas guzzling V8 engine and let idle a half hour

...and so on and so on...You get the idea.

I say that if enough of us lard assed middle aged, ever greying, ever balding curmudgeons get together today we can teach the tree huggin snot nosed sniveling liberals a lesson or two about the resiliency of our planet.

Man Made Climate Change???

Bah Humbug

Fester & Ooze

My New Company Name?


I'm getting a bit punchy down here on the Georgia coast this afternoon.

Anyone but me notice?

pOOL DAy

Any Excuse To Play...


With my packing and CAD projects well in hand, I hope you will understand if I take a few hours out in order to crash the pool over at our old Condo.

Pat and Missy the Turbo Pup have their swim suits on, and I've donned my Cammo shorts (to piss off the local curmudgeons) and I think some sunburn an early season suntan will ensue.

Splassssshhhhhh

Past, Present, and Future

Life Flashing Before My Eyes...


OK Folks...

Needless to say I'm preoccupied, but I hate neglecting my Internet presence so here's today's posting for friends and family so you'll know nothing is wrong (a friend was worried I was sick again.)

Dang I'm having a good time leaving our little Island...if such a thing is possible.

We're trying to eat out at all of our favorite restaurants one last time before Wednesday, and in the process I've probably spent three hundred dollars in the past week on XXL and L sized Polo and T-shirts with logo's and cartoons on them in the process.

Meanwhile, we're trying to clean out the deep freezer so it can be put on the Truck, so tonight I'm cooking for six guests and featuring my patented "Low Country Boil" (large shrimp, Cajun Andouille sausage, red potatoes, and corn on the cob), giant bacon wrapped grilled sea scallops with roasted red bell pepper sauce, Steamed Alaskan King Crab legs, augmented with drawn butter and home made seafood cocktail sauce.

All of this in the middle of packing my office, my garage/workshop, and finishing two industrial stack projects.

I hate to say it...but it's really tough being me these days.

(I wish I could have EVERYONE over for dinner tonight-go out and have a nice meal on me...if you will.)

Someone With Waaaaayyyy Too Much Time On Their Hands...

Check THIS Out!

Due To Conditions Beyond My Control

Today Is Officially Cancelled...


See you all tomorrow.

Busy Busy Busy

Or Is It Sleep Walking?


Talk about being "scatter brained"...

I've not only had to admit that I have multiple personalities, but now I have gone out and developed multiple personal and professional lives, in multiple cities (is there a made-for-TV Lifetime Movie in this story?)

Case in point, my ongoing design work relating to my prior life as an industrial smokestack designer.

One new job down on the Mississippi Gulf coast involving not one but TEN stacks is just getting started, while the other project working for our lovely post WWII NATO allies over in Deutschland seems to have taken on the persona of a Man-made Engineering "Zombie" that absolutely refuses to die.

Our monstrosity (ultimately residing in California of all places) and it's keepers thus far eats drawings and spits out inane comments on an irregular basis for over a year now.

I'm hoping that my larger hammer a large dose of patience and a few hours in front of AutoCAD will ultimately drive a stake through this miserable beast of a project's wildly pounding heart and give the rest of my small but capable engineering team a rest from our torture.

On the home front, I'm still buying and filling new boxes in anticipation of the arrival of a giant truck in my driveway next Wednesday. Things are still bouncing along up in Eastern Tennessee and hopefully large sums of money will soon be changing hands in return for a lovely pile of bricks, mortar, and Sheetrock (with some tile and hardwood floors thrown in for good measure.)

What has really taken the Lion's share of my efforts and attention these days is the hiring of additional contractors to replace my ancient creaking carcass on the jobsite complete my own version of "Tip This House" (as opposed to the TV show "Flip this House")...get it?

Speaking from personal experience--inside and outside the profession--most of the time the words "self employed residential contractor" means formerly really nice guy, with a large family and an indeterminate substance abuse problem, which may or may not answer the telephone or show up at the pre-determined time on the pre-arranged job site on any given day of the week.

Any way, sorry for my absence from the Internet yesterday, but I hope that my friends, family, and the rest of my on-line lurkers readers will forgive me because....

I'M B-U-S-Y

McDonalds To Discontinue Dollar Menu?

Introduces Euro-Menu


Oh I don't know...where to start this morning?

I guess it all depends on how many of you have been paying attention to the so-called "news" over the past decade.

A couple of things are on my mind today, optimally tied together by this AP story.

Follow along with me as I read a little:

AP
Food Costs Rising Fastest in 17 Years
Monday April 14, 4:10 pm ET
By Ellen Simon, AP Business Writer

Food Costs Rising at Fast Clip, Squeezing Poor, Forcing Food Vendors to Explain Higher Prices

NEW YORK (AP) -- Steve Tarpin can bake a graham cracker crust in his sleep, but explaining why the price for his Key lime pies went from $20 to $25 required mastering a thornier topic: global economics.

He recently wrote a letter to his customers and posted it near the cash register listing the factors -- dairy prices driven higher by conglomerates buying up milk supplies, heat waves in Europe and California, demand from emerging markets and the weak dollar.(emphasis mine-VRRIII)

The owner of Steve's Authentic Key Lime Pies in Brooklyn said he didn't want customers thinking he was "jacking up prices because I have a unique product."

"I have to justify it," he said

Yeah, Mr. Tarpin, I think that you would be absolutely correct when you attribute rising food costs to "emerging markets" and the "weak [American] Dollar."

As the Chinese, India, and the third World continue to grow in population at a faster rate than the US and gain economic strength, at the same time they are using things like FOOD at a faster rate just like they use more OIL--thus higher Gas Prices (no, it's not Oil Company profits to blame...)

As to the veracity of your worries about giant corporations of wild eyed rich dudes trying to corner the market on milk and Owl Gore's Global Warming induced crop failures costing your customers money...I have to claim ignorance and ask you to provide me with some more reference materials before I can agree with your assertion.

As far as I know they don't grow many Key Limes in Europe and California...

Regardless, I don't doubt that it costs more to make a Key Lime pie these days than it did ten or twenty years ago, but I also believe that New Yorkers won't start having to decide between affording brain surgery or making their rent controlled apartment payment versus downing a wedge of the Conch Republic's (the Florida Keys') most famous export food after a $10 cheese burger any time soon.

Regarding the weak Dollar, you have a chance to look to Washington and make some substantial changes in November--Republican & Democrat alike--if you don't like the lower confidence the world has in our currency.

The borrow and spend, spend, spend policies that support the liberals beloved social programs are at least partially responsible for the increased cost of financing government debt and the lower purchasing power of your Lincolns and Franklin's in your wallet.

Also, you have to realize that the consolidation of the European currencies, in the form of the Euro, has at least partially accomplished their original goal--to COMPETE economically with the United-By-God-States of America.

Still, if you're paying attention you will know that the European Union and the Euro are wobbly alliances at best, and the British people's refusal to abandon the Queen's Pound and the French rejection of the EU's deep socialist underpinnings (pot calling the kettle black?) provides plenty of evidence of the potential long term problems they face.

Now, having at first apparently excluded Owl Gore and the Global Warming Eco-weenies from this argument, I have to bring them back in and reference the collateral damage caused by government response to their policies.

Can you say E-T-H-A-N-O-L?

That's right, do a Google search and look at the effect that making fuel from corn and other grain products is having on animal feed prices and by default--meat and dairy prices.

I read somewhere (I can't find the reference) that it takes something like 400 pounds of grain to make 40 gallons of ethanol.

Four HUNDRED pounds of corn--enough to feed a human in Ethiopia for an entire YEAR.

All for a couple of tanks full of gasoline equivalent (actually one tank in my Suburban.)

How can that possibly be efficient?

Another fact I've read is that Iowa--the so-called "Breadbasket of America," is now a net IMPORTER of CORN.

That's right, they're HAULING CORN to Iowa because Iowa is now full of Ethanol plants churning out Owl Gore's "Elixir of Energy Independence."

I'm smart, but I'm happy that I'm not THAT SMART...





How about YOU?

A Great Man's Birthday

265 Years Ago Yesterday


This man was born...

Then he built this house some time later:




Then he died, and in my opinion...we've had a great deal of trouble replacing him ever since.

RIP Mr. Jefferson

Yankees' Avoid Boston Red Sox Curse?

What...Still No Jimmy Hoffa?

Understand?

Here's the real story if you missed it...

(yeah...I did this myself in a couple of minutes with Photoshop)

African Queen New Steam Boat

I want One


Take a look at this beauty...

It's a real steam powered personal yacht, complete with a fiberglass copy of a lapstrake hull, a 14 HP steam engine, and a small fire tube boiler.

A little company called Mosquito Enterprises builds them up in the Northwest and I think that one of these marvels would be perfect for day use on the Tennessee River.

You could go putt-putt-putting along all day on a few armloads of wood without worrying about $4.50 gas at the local marina gas dock.

You also can't tell me that me and my boating party wouldn't bring a smile to the faces of almost everyone we meet along our way.

Am I crazy?

Cutting Myself With Cardboard?

Difficult...But Not Impossible


If, in the course of making this move, I could take credit for planning and administrative duties only, then I'd be 90% complete.

I could just coast through the remaining nine days before the truck shows up in our driveway spending my time THRASHING my computer exorcising the spirits removing the last annoying vestiges of the digital criminal assault I've endured this past week.

But nooooo, not me...

I, in my infinite wisdom, elected to "self pack" rather than allowing total strangers to touch all of our stuff letting the moving company handle containerizing our belongings prior to transport.

I, in my ongoing patient stupidity, continue to attempt to write new Excel Spreadsheets and do AutoCAD drawings on a computer that insists on selling me cheep drugs from a Canadian Pharmacy and help me meet "hot local Seniors" living in my area.

Then there's my new flugelhorn which arrived Friday and is beckoning to me from it's velvet lined case in the corner of the living room.

That said, hopefully you can understand why my writing efforts have suffered this weekend.

I'll try to do better...and be assured that I hope you feel free to entertain yourselves in the mean time.

My Old Friend's Back

I think...


After nearly a week of agony, enduring infinite pop-up's trying to sell me anti-spy software and other crap I don't want or need, it seems that a combination of my Norton software and a security download from Microsoft exorcised the demons from my HP notebook computer.

I guess only time will tell...

I'd Rather...But Not DAN Rather

Part XVIII


In my efforts to catch up with laughing at/criticizing Former CBS News anchor Dan Rather, I found this story this morning about a Judge dismissing a chunk of his lawsuit against his old employer and some of it's executives:

A Manhattan judge has dismissed portions of a lawsuit Dan Rather has filed against CBS and Viacom. Judicial Hearing Officer Ira Gammerman on Thursday allowed the lawsuit to go forward, but struck down the parts of the suit that name Viacom Chairman Sumner Redstone, CBS President Leslie Moonves and former CBS News President Andrew Heyward.

A lawyer for the defendants, lead outside counsel James Quinn, said the judge's ruling eliminated Rather's core complaints of fraud and breach of good faith and fair dealing. The lawyer said it was hard to see how the ex-anchor's assertion of a conspiracy between CBS and the Bush administration "will have any traction going forward."

Remember that things haven't been going so good for old Dan since his airing of the fake story about President Bush's Texas Air National Guard service?

Well, apparently things have continued down hill since then.

Now not only does poor old Dan have trouble discerning the difference between his own ass and a hole in the ground, but I've just found some evidence that he can also no longer find his nose when he needs a nice fat juicy Booger...

"Where's my nose...no wait...where's my middle finger...I can't even shoot a bird anymore..."

Resurrecting Brain Cells

Muscles Hopefully to Follow Suit...


Having already spent three or four hours this morning writing formulas for things like "moment of inertia" and calculating the section modulus of thin shelled cylinders, now I'm being coerced to wander back over to my soon to be "former construction job site" with my new contractor Chuck to demonstrate my replacement window installation technique.

I hope my back and legs hold up--I could definitely feel the results last night of a couple months time off laying around on the sofa.

Meanwhile, the contents of my life are starting to disappear into brown cardboard boxes which seem to sprout up each day in various nooks and crannies. I have to ration them out to Pat else she'd have my underwear (and possibly me) packed inside bubble wrap by now.

I HATE moving.

This will make five times in eight years.

Who's idea was this anyway??

Another Blast From My Past

Silly Childhood Memorabilia


Good old E-Bay.

I found this model kit, a copy of which I built and made fly back in the late 1960's, for sale on E-Bay and last night I claimed it as the high bidder for $7.50 plus postage.




It'll be here next week and I'll be standing by the mailbox to receive it.

The Internet Giveth

And Comcast Taketh Away

Everything here electronic that communicated with the outside world (except cell phones) died last night sometime after one AM.

No cable TV.

No Cable Modem.

No VoIP telephone.

I hope no-one was looking for us.

About 6:30 the signal just came back on, and off, and on, and so Onnnnnn and I just now managed to get the Vonage box and the Router and the Cable modem all reset and happy with each other, but now it's time to get dressed and wander over to my construction debacle to meet a couple of contractors and try to get things moving again.

Be back later this afternoon...y'all have a good day...

Feels So Good

I Got It...


With any luck at all, upon receipt of this:




This Guy:


Will be imitating this guy:


(yes y'all...that middle picture's the new skinny me chasing Missy the Turbo Pup around on her leash...and no Mom, I didn't cut my hair it's just pulled back...)

"Broomstick One"

Couldn't Resist

Thanks Rodge...

My Orchestra Grows

Playing Out Of Tune In Multiple Languages Keys


Well folks, I'm happy to report that when I'm not wrestling with my computers or various physical infirmities, buying real estate, or contemplating major lifestyle changes and geographical relocation, I find myself cruising around E-Bay and other nooks and crannies of the Internet looking for weird stuff to add to my collection of musical instruments I can't play try to make noise with occasionally.

Case in point, this lovely Holton Trumpet I managed to be the high bidder on last evening just before my Computer was possessed by supernatural demons.

Here's a photo of my prize, that will soon be resting next to a few dozen Harmonicas, my Ukulele, and the prized Australian made Didgeridoo:

I'm also looking at a Flugelhorn (think Chuck Mangione), some steel drums, and some kind of keyboard to fill out my new basement music studio.

(don't worry, I actually spent about eight or nine years of my life playing the Trumpet back in the 1970's and 1980's, then sold the instrument in a fit of insanity, but with any luck I might be able to reproduce a tolerable tone again by this fall.)

Three Hours Later

Almost Back To Normal...


Damn hackers.

Damn Windows.

Damn Windows Computers.

Damn Microsoft.

Double Damn Bill Gates.

I wish we could all go back to the days when all you needed to do was understand the lines contained in "config.sys" and you were some kind of Genius.

(I've got the laptop back running in a belching and farting mode so I'm writing this posting on it now, but there's obviously still some kind of spirit hiding in the background...anyone know a good Shaman or Witch Doctor?)

This guy...perhaps?

Went To Bed With A Working Computer

Woke Up With A Stranger


I'm about ready to kill somebody this morning.

One bullet to the brain...AFTER I break their typing fingers.

Better yet, I'll get an assortment of household chemicals and slowly dissolve them in a cloud of acrid fumes.

Regardless of the method of revenge, if I could find the moron that managed to hack a bunch of stupid adware and spyware past my Norton 360 programs sometime after about 9:30 last night while the computer was sitting on the coffee table minding it's own business they would regret the day they were born.

Now after "sweeping" the system I find that Task Manager has been "disabled by the administrator" (that is supposed to be me) and when I turn the computer off and do a cold boot I get a foreign Adware warning with an offer to download some solution program, then the keyboard freezes up and the mouse won't do anything either.

I've had to resort to retreating to Pat's office to use her computer just to get my morning fix of news and tell you what's aching my butt this AM.

I got to go get a couple of hammers now and see if I can fine tune the performance of my ailing machine. Somebody send up a flare if you don't hear from me by tonight...

Charlton Heston's Dead

I'm Not Feeling So Young Myself


Here's a link to the press release issued by his family late this evening.

Personally, I think that the most amazing thing about the man was that he was married to the same woman for 64 of his 84 years.

I guess the NRA will be looking for a new spokesman.

RIP Mr. Heston